Welcome to my new Thread! I'm excited, as it's the first day of the rest of my life. Do you like the title? If you can make it out, it is coincidentally the title I'm having put on my Vanity Plate when I buy a new car.
Vengence is mine sayeth the Lord, but he never said we couldn't be just a little bit pi$$y.
Honestly, I hope that someday my XH will reach out for the help he so desperately needs, but it is not within my power.
All I can do is keep being the best person I know how to be everyday, one day at a time. If there are people out there who buy into what he is saying about me, that is their problem, and I must assume they do not know me. Off for the next three days. Supposed to be sunny & warm. I hope so. Trying not to think about the judge's decision, as it won't get me anywhere to worry about it.
My oldest daughter sent me a Mom's Day card today, and she can't even bring herself to use my last name. She sent it to me with my last married name, from 23 years ago.
For anyone who wasn't able to decipher the puzzle above, it's Who's Sorry Now. If you can think of a different/better way to put it into six letters, let me know!!!
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
Hi ... just caught up with everything. So sorry, but I'm sure you are relieved. I hope the judge had something to say about your X taking stuff from the marital home. And, I hope you refuted a few things your H lied about. Like, the A was started before he left. (Although, I bet the judge has heard it all before, and knows that those having A's, have likely started before WAS left.) And, why should you agree to selling everything and splitting it ... hope he's including all that expensive equipment he took from the shed. Why can't he take what he wants, and you take what you want, then you can both dispose of it however you want to. And, I hope what you had before you got married was not included in the marital stuff.
I'm sorry, but your X is a dooshbag (sp?) right now. I think most people who know you, will know that you are a wonderful person. Your family certainly thinks so and they are the only one's that count, not so.
Whatever happened to the stolen id case with OW?
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
The Prosecuting Attorney at that time had bigger fish to fry. Not worried about my little old identity theft. I have been advised to pursue it now that a new PA is in office. May do that as soon as I know what the judge's ruling is. Once that comes down, depending on what it is, I will have a lot of decisions to make. For now, just one day at a time.
I expected that the adrenalin rush of the court hearing would wear off and leave me drained.
I would be lying to all of you and myself if I said I was in any way jubilant or satisfied or even happy. I am not.
This weekend has been much like the weekends early on in our separation. Lonely, lost, and depressed. I went through all the motions: Church, decoration at the cemetary on my Mom and GM's graves. I then drove about 26 miles out of town to decorate on xh's Mom's grave. Had lunch midway with Xh's aunt.
I truly believe that it is the Lord's wish that we D and for me to get out of the way; so that perhaps, just perhaps, my XH will begin to realize that the D didn't make his unhappiness go away. Perhaps be open to accepting help with the PTSD and alcoholism. I can't say I expected to feel great about it, I didn't, but am still extremely hurt by his attitude towards me in the courtroom. His total belief that I am the cause of all his unhappiness. His lies that we fought all the time. He basically made everything I believed about our M out to be a lie. Like I wasted the last twenty years of my life.
I know that being D'd doesn't mean I have to give up on my XH, but feeling very twisted overall. One day at a time, one foot in front of the other. Be the bigger person. Rise above it all.
In short, am feeling very lost at the moment. Very much like I felt over a year ago when this all started. Like he is getting to move on with his life, and I am still stuck.
I know better. Knowing better however doesn't make me feel better. Still very sad.
I know that so many of us who joined the Board at about the same time are going through the same things at this time. It's almost as if we were a graduating class of some kind. It's much easier to say than to do, even when you know it was the right thing.
It's OK to have the sad feelings...you need to mourn...it may take a while...just remember that after every dark night there is always a bright morning coming...
As to what H did and said in the court room...all I can say is that you mustn't take that personally....you know that their brains are scrambled and they justify everything so they don't have to accept responsibility.
Be good to yourself my dear...this too shall pass
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
