I got home from work and WW immediately left for Yoga, again. I took S11 to the gym and had a seriously good workout. Afterwards we left to eat and we may catch a flick. My d19 was messaging my wW and I trying to figure out what we were doing for NYE.
WW told me that she wasnt doing anything but D19 let the cat out of the bag and WW is going to Vegas. Good lord. GGW i guess.
I messaged WW because i have to take care of D19s cat and want to confirm if S11 has to stay with me at D19s place.
WW responds to tell me shes going to see a friend, who guess what? Is going through a D right now. Waywards have to stick together now. But she doesnt stop there, she goes on to tell me that shes going because she needs to be around people that dont think she is a piece of sh*t for a few days.
Sure WW. Whatever you say. Then she finishes off by saying "it's not like you ever tell me what you are doing anyway".
Now wW wants me to refinance the house and buy her out. I'm not doing anything for her or to make her life easier.
I just responded "I'm sorry you feel that way, I will look into it".
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
WW got up super early and left to Vegas. I'm sure she is with OM. It bothers me but I need to ignore her and continue to focus on GAL. I'm going to go look at condos today.
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
WW got up super early and left to Vegas. I'm sure she is with OM. It bothers me but I need to ignore her and continue to focus on GAL. I'm going to go look at condos today.
For you or for her?
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
I'm going to look at condos for me. WW wont move out. WW keeps lying and traveling to see OM. I am really tired of the cake eating and disrespect. I would stay here but I cant afford this beautiful home by myself. I doubt I can qualify to refinance it.
I get my legal benefits on the 1st. Going to get an L and have them draw up a custody agreement. WW still hasn't filed for D. I'm not going to file but I am feeling pretty strong about moving out. WW doesnt want me. I dont want to live with a woman that has so little care for me that she continues to lie and continues her A.
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
I'm having a very hard time with my anger today. I really want to blast my WW with messages about her lying and trip to Vegas. Please help talk me out of this. Good God.
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
ST... Do NOT send your WW any messages. Just don’t. It won’t do anything except further her resolve to D. Focus on yourself and on spending time with your children and GAL activities. I know this hurts. I get it. Honestly...the deaths of my parents were easier to get through than this and I loved my parents immensely. But this level of hurt and anger can’t last if you don’t let it. Right now your emotions and unhelpful thoughts are in control. Take the control back. Choose your focus. Choose better, not bitter. Go work out or for a walk or journal or do anything else but send your WW messages. You WILL get through this. Try to do it with your dignity and self-respect intact. You don’t NEED her to survive. You WANT her but that is not the same thing. Choose your focus. Take it off of her and put it back onto you. (((ST)))
Thanks DV. Taking S11 for a haircut. Going to get some food. I was going to go workout but I have a bad headache. Probably part of why I'm in a bad mood. I hit the gym hard yesterday. Very sore today.
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
I am going to decide whether to move out soon. I am considering it and removing the emotions and just listing positive and negative.
Negative
It will hurt both me and my kids because they have always lived with me I will no longer have a nice big house Costs will be a little more I wont see my kids 50% of the time
Positive I can truly focus on myself without seeing WW all the time. I will be able to have my kids still. I wont have to split Bill's with WW. I will be able to detach much easier. GAL will be easy every other week when I'm alone I can fully relax and let my emotions show if I'm alone
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
You are there ST! I feel the force when reading your posts here! You are getting there! Keep moving forward. You are showing confidence and consistency.
Go for all man!
WW H(me): 53 W: 48 T: 27 M: 22 S: 18 Piecing since 03/2016 Saw the light in the storm
Thanks Neffer. It's a rough decision. I will have to discuss with WW because she will either help me willingly or help me because the courts say so. That's what happens when she makes a lot more money and she destroys her family.
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
