TF, sorry to hear about the PA or "almost PA" you discovered, but it's not really surprising. Most WAS's consider themselves divorced at BD and free to do whatever they want when it comes to pursuing others. I think it's probably upsetting you because you were still clinging to the notion that maybe somewhere down deep she still loves you and wants to be with you and that this is all just a bad dream that'll wash away with the morning light. But the reality is she is 100% done and pursuing her fantasy "perfect" life without you. It hurts but now you know and can live your life accordingly. Again I'll just remind you that this is how she feels right now, at this one particular moment in time. That doesn't mean she won't have a change of heart later, chances are she will. But it's going to be way down the road.
As far as her pushing you to sign the decree, I suspect there's something else going on, like maybe OM won't be physical with her until it's signed out of some messed up sense of perceived nobility. Contributing to breaking up a marriage is what it is though, he's certainly no knight in shining armor.
Sounds like you are handling things well as far as trying to detach as much as you can, so well done. Keep it up! I think you'll come out of this a lot better/ stronger/ happier than she will.
Last edited by Cadet; 01/03/1906:34 PM. Reason: Start a new thread message
TF- I wonder if the pushing for the decree to be signed is trying to get closure on the situation. I think she finds herself thinking about you all the time and maybe she thinks that with the decree signed she will finally be grazing on those greener pastures that she thinks over there but isn't sure because she's still tied to you on this side of the fence. Just my two cents. Probably doesn't mean a thing. Be the lighthouse and run your marathon.
M46 W44 T20 M19 S21 D17 D11 D9 BD 1/2003 Reconciled 2/2004 Contemplating leaving again 4/2018 Deciding to stay 10/2018 (dodged another bullet...few)
H(37) W(35) D8, D5, S3 T20, M13 BD 8/31/18 EA Discovered 9/13/18 Mediation 10/3/18 W files for D 10/12/18 W moves out 11/10/18 EA confirmed 12/25/18 D Final 1/10/19
