I'm still here, had a storm Friday night that knocked out modem so we don't have access to internet. I'll read everyone's post and try to get back to everyone. I'm sorry for making you worry about me.
W did move all her stuff out Saturday.
Thank you all so much for your thoughts and prayers wow, its hard to read some of your remarks, so many people looking in on me it locked up the post. Thank you all I don't know how to express how much you guys mean to me, how much you help.
I have so much to tell everyone
I'm going to be happy, helpful, forgiving, patient and loving. Not just to W and kids, but to everyone I know and meet. This is me, this is how I want to live my life, this may not be the best course of action to save a marriage, but its the best way to live my life. I have to keep remembering this
We all have a long haul ahead of us good or bad it's the path we choose thats important.
M45 WAW41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me Separated 1 day June 1st
Jeff, I'm glad you're OK. Sometimes things have to get worse before they get better (or, as my sister likes to say, "God will break you before He fixes you), but unfortunately the wayward spouse has to ALLOW themselves to be broken, and some simply aren't ready for that.
I'll look forward to hearing more as you get time and feel up to it, but I wanted to just let you know I was thinking about you this morning. We may not always agree on tactics, but I really admire your strength and character.
New abbreviation for everyone = WAM = Walk Away Mom
Journal Section Saturday morning, I was expecting to take D9 and D6D6 to softball in the morning, this would have killed off most of the morning, but because of the rain, we had nowhere to go, so we went to my moms house for the morning.
Told my mom what was going on, she doesn't understand how W could do this, she asked if W had someone else in the picture and I said yes she did.
When I was at my moms, Dorothy, my neighbor elderly lady with direct link to W's mom, called me crying, she saw moving van and was upset thought W was taking the kids away from me. I calmed her down and told her the kids would stay with me, at the house.
We kept busy all day and at 3:00 I called W to see I could come home, Brought kids home to a empty house, D9 knows what's going on, twins and S5 really don't, at least not yet. They all will get accustomed to the idea during this summer.
Sunday took kids to church, my mind wasn't on church, we all went to pool as a family (separate cars, W came up later) and had a good time with some friends, (they don't know yet) took kids home
Special Interest Section
Saturday morning, W wanted to know why I wouldn't let her take kids to school in Sept, I told her I don't want her over at the house everyday, she said I didn't need to see her, she could just pull up and pickup the kids, I told her no again, I do not want you over here everyday, I add one thing, "do not push me on this issue"
Saturday night, took kids to pool for a couple of hours, had dinner up there, came home and neighbor wanted to talk, so we sat down. She knows W cannot handle kids, she has been out with them. She said she would be there is I needed her. Said some things, that I would not have expected, W told her that I would be surprised of how much debit she is in, I know, remember I'm an ex-snooper. Told me how rude W has been to her and the other lady that's W's mom's friend. That W's mom knows something is up because whenever she sees the kids, I'm there and W isn't. Mothers day, I showed up at W's moms and W showed up later in separate car.
Told neighbor about W's OM
Saturday night, W had to work, works late, 2:00am, wanted to be at our house so when kids woke up she was there, so she climbed into bed with me.
Sunday, neighbor and W's mom's friend were together, I know what the hot topic was. W's mom should know by now that W moved out on me and the kids.
W allowed D9 to have friend over, she told everyone she was going shopping, and she never returned. I set up a movie night for the kids, I put out a big sleeping bag, and we got pillows and covers for all, I popped some popcorn, and kids had a great time.
W returns home Monday morning before kids wake up and puts on her PJ's
I'm going to be happy, helpful, forgiving, patient and loving. Not just to W and kids, but to everyone I know and meet. This is me, this is how I want to live my life, this may not be the best course of action to save a marriage, but its the best way to live my life
We all have a long haul ahead of us good or bad it's the path we choose thats important.
M45 WAW41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W in good mood when she came home Monday morning to take care of the kids, how do I handle that, she was smiling and in a good mood, I just want to throw-up.
I can't let her see me in a bad mood or I cannot get mad at her, I kept quiet and left for work.
do not let this change the way you are doing anything. Her moods are going to be up and down, its the nature of the beast, especially with WAS. Just go on like your normally would.
take care
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
W in good mood when she came home Monday morning to take care of the kids, how do I handle that, she was smiling and in a good mood, I just want to throw-up.
Jeff, my H had the biggest smile I've ever seen on his face the day he came home to move out! But the funny thing is, that's the last time I've seen him look happy, since then he pretty much looks depressed to me & definitely has not had a happy look on his face. I think your W is in the early honeymoon glow of moving out and being carefree or whatever, but I betcha it wears off pretty quick! Until then, I would just ignore it and try to act as confident & happy yourself. I think you will find yourself happier as time goes on and your W getting depressed, at least that's how it seemed to work out for us anyway. Karen
Thanks tiredandlost, thank you for checking in on me, wow, you got married young, thanks for the note, Rollercoaster emotions, great, just being here helps me, I will be myself, thank you
Karen43: I hope, early honeymoon glow of moving out, will wear off. I hope so, my whole premise was to let my W go, if she comes back I will be open to reconciliation.
It was the only thing I could do, she wanted to move into fantasy land, it looks so good, I could say no. She has to experience fantasy land. I don't think she will get the full experience until she is working fulltime and doesn't get to see her kids everyday
We all have a long haul ahead of us good or bad it's the path we choose thats important.
M45 WAW41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
I heard someone talking on the radio today about him and his ex-W, how they D then remarried, he said they talked everyday, my W called me three times already today. She is a great mood and I can't stand it, as soon as I get home, she will leave. She gets to be with the kids all day then go and do what she wants, what a life.
I cannot wait for the kids to be in school fulltime, and the W is working, so I don't have to see her and I can get myself and the kids on a set schedule. This summer is going to be hard on me, I need to get off my butt and get some work done around the house (keep my mind off of W)
Like I said earlier, I don't have internet access at home right now and I'll have to wait for AT&T to send me a new modem
I will try to keep up with everyone's post, right now I don't have the time and I don't think I would be of any help to anyone, you know the guy who wanted his W to leave
We all have a long haul ahead of us good or bad it's the path we choose thats important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM 05/31/08 (Walk Away Mom)
Trust me, Jeff, it WILL hit her at some point. You can eat nothing but ice cream every day, and it's good for awhile, but pretty soon you just hurl your guts out.
