I agree. Somehow my life had become all about how I can make H happy, how I can help him meet all of his goals, make his dreams come true, etc and I forgot all about what I wanted out of life... I knew you didn't mean literally but it was still an interesting visual for me...
I want my kids to see happy mommy too, not just sad/tired/angry mommy. Good goal Liz. Enjoy yourself! If you need to start small go get a starbucks...
Grr. I am so mad at H right now. I asked him the other day if he ever planned to file for a D or if I would have to. H said a dissolution would be the better route. As my T pointed out that doesn't answer my question as to if he will file or not. I figure he wants the easy way out. Dis would be quicker, cheeper and look like we agree to it. I didn't tell him, but I decided later I'm not ready to agree to a Dis. H has not seen his T in over 6 months. I won't agree to a Dis until he gets back into IC and attends some type of joint T. I the mean time my Ds have realized I'm pissed at him. D16 confronted me last night and thinks I am the one not trying. If only she knew. Obviously I need to change my behavior. Oh well, looking forward to a great weekend with the Ds.
R 23 years M 20 years Bomb June 2007 S Oct 2007 Ds 11 & 16 Ds and I moved out Aug. 2008
Why do you want you him to go to IC to divorce him? Are you hoping that could bring him back to his senses?
I think you could talk to D16 and be frank. I think she would understand, dont you? xxx K
I want him to go to IC because he is in self destruct mode. He is taking himself down and I don't want him taking the Ds with him. It wouldn't be good finance wise if he self-destructed. He is so far gone from his senses, I don't think he will come back.
As for being honest with D, my T and the Ds T say we have to tell them the party line of mommy and daddy are happier apart. Blah, blah...it is better not to tell them the truth. So I can't say "You know R....your dad wouldn't answer my calls for a year and a half. H wants to end our marriage without ever having tried to save it. H wants to pretend he gives a d---. Your dad doesn't mind visiting our house when he chooses after a year of ignoring us and pretend everything is ok. Sorry if I don't care to answer his calls and texts." I would love to tell her that, but I'm not allowed.
R 23 years M 20 years Bomb June 2007 S Oct 2007 Ds 11 & 16 Ds and I moved out Aug. 2008
I hear you Red. We told our son yesterday and it was so hard to just keep saying that "mommy and daddy cannot get along with each other so we need to live in different houses". Really, Mommy can't get along with Daddy b/c he lies and disrespects her and doesn't honor his commitment to her...But yes that is bad to tell them, so we go with the party line...
I hope you are doing things that make you happy. Thought of you yesterday at church. The youth pastor was telling the kids how we are tools that can be used for great things if we put ourselves in God's hands....but at one point she told the kids, "We are all tools" and it made me think of the loser guy you met out dancing.... I KNOW she didn't mean THAT kind of tool...
Sorry you had to drop the big bag of crap on the kids:(
H just called to tell me that I could put food in his empty freezer if I needed to. How funny.
I am doing fun things: I will probably go out with wild friends this weekend. Next weekend I am doing dinner and a show with work friends. I hope you are having some fun yourself. Don't tell me about the running, that isn't fun in my book.
R 23 years M 20 years Bomb June 2007 S Oct 2007 Ds 11 & 16 Ds and I moved out Aug. 2008
Hello friends. I realized I haven't posted in awhile so I thought I would update everyone. Close your eyes and what do you see? That as what has developed since my last post...nothing.
I made it through Valentine's day without a tear. It hasn't been a day I cared for since the cute days of childhood. I did get a few cute gifts from my students so that made me good. One of my brothers and his family were in town for the weekend, so I had them to keep me busy and distracted.
I am thinking about looking into a planned seperation through a lawyer. Anyone done that and have feedback?
R 23 years M 20 years Bomb June 2007 S Oct 2007 Ds 11 & 16 Ds and I moved out Aug. 2008
