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#1758006 04/27/09 06:26 AM
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Well I guess moving to the divorced forum was just wishful thinking. We are separated but sharing a house still.

We had court on the 15th, & our hearing was postponed. The brand new judge had a conflict of interest. We've had proposals and counters going back & forth between attorneys for weeks. It seems that H wants to drag this out as long as possible. Gee what a surprise. <sarcasm>

He's been sleeping on an air mattress in the family room for months now but coming in/out of the bedroom/bathroom whenever he chose to.

After another major blow out fight, about money of course, I put a lock on the bedroom door, & moved his necessities out. Having a bit of privacy has made it bearable. He & I don't speak (well he did ask me where the plunger was the other day) except to exchange information about the kids. It's so surreal at times. Our anniversary is on Tuesday. I thought we'd be living separately & close to divorced by now.

Tonight someone reminded me how much my posting & sharing my experiences helped them through their tough times. It has helped me a lot too.


M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months
4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10
I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
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oh, & my thread title references the fact that I'm the one here wanting out of my marriage.


M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months
4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10
I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,424
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(((((((cookie)))))))

Hang in there! Did you help him find the plunger? \:\)

I know he is an idiot. And lots of other things. I think focusing on your self and the kids will help the time pass. Be the best cookie you can be. Keep your dignity. Keep your respect for yourself. You have helped a lot of people, and I hope we have all helped you a little, too.

You can still do this gracefully. You'll feel a lot better about it. Our situations are different, in that my W is not acting at all like your H, but other than that our paths our similar. So, keep looking at the positives in you. You will be fine!

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Hi cookie,
sorry it takes so long... I hope things get resolved quickly and you can live your life the way you want to.
xxxx
K


Me&H:42
S11&D10
Bomb 5/2007-Sep 11/2007
Reconc.November 2009
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Hiya Cooks!

Can I have a champagne please?? Oh wait...never mind..I'm quaffing one now!!

Sad to be drinking on my own though...c'mon over!


**
Purple

As soon as you trust yourself you will know how to live. Goethe

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((Jeff)) No I did not help him find the plunger. He's got to learn to survive without me being the "keeper of stuff". lol

You're exactly right about focusing on me & the kids helps the time pass & be savored as well.

I took D14 to Phantom of the Opera last night. It was AMAZING !
The set, the music, the costumes, the love.........ah !!! It was something I'd wanted to do for years and years. Living life is such much better than just dreaming about living life.

Hugs


M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months
4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10
I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,978
S
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OP Offline
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(((Kalni))))

It's not so long compared to what you're going through sweetie. I'm so sorry that things are turning out this way for you. I think of you so very often. One day I am coming to your area & walking those white sandy beaches and giving you a big hug in person.

xoxoxo


M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months
4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10
I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,978
S
Member
OP Offline
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S
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,978
Hiya Purple !!! How have you been ? um, what's quaffing ? I'm guessing it's guzzling. lol

Nice to see you sweets.


M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months
4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10
I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,424
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Offline
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,424
(((((cookie)))))

I think he'd look good with a plunger stuck on his nose! \:\)

Phantom sounds great! I hope D14 enjoyed it! Time's fun when you're having flies.... I think Kermit said that!

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Cookie--

I love love love Phantom! Of course, only live theater beats the movie version with Gerard Butler as the Phantom! YUMMY!

Hang tough, sweetie. resolution comes in time, albeit not fast enough when someone is trying to make your life miserable on purpose.

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW


M40/H36
T16/M14
4K
B2/08
S4/08
current

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through
every circumstance.
I Corinthians 13:7



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