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Volleydog,

Glad to know I'm not alone, even though I'd hate to see someone else going through the same thing. Your right, sometimes I wish I could just forget him and move on the way he was able to do with me.

lynn08 #1774397 05/28/09 04:39 AM
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Originally Posted By: jennlynnb08
Volleydog,

Glad to know I'm not alone, even though I'd hate to see someone else going through the same thing. Your right, sometimes I wish I could just forget him and move on the way he was able to do with me.


I wish that sometimes too. I wish I was able to disgard our M and my H the way he has done.

But then I get back into reality and am glad I do have emotion and concern about my H and my M. I would never want to be able to behave the way he has chosen to behave. I would never want to treat a M or another person that way.

I am sorry things are so difficult Jenn. I wish I had encouraging words for you but I really don't. I know it's hard and I'm sorry. I am glad you're staying strong in your faith.


Me:28, first M
H: 33, second M
Married: 08/08
Bomb: 10/08
H filed D and deployed: 12/08
Served: 04/09
I deploy: 07/09
Hearing date: 08/09

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So how are things going Jen?


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
MrBond #1774925 05/29/09 04:13 AM
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lynn08 Offline OP
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Thank u fit for the support! And u bring up an excellent point!

Stuck_ thanks for checking in. I'm good, h and I have had to talk a few times the last few days but strictly house matters as we are trying to coordinate listing is for sale. I somehow am able to keep it very business like and I have been saying bye first every time. I don't initiate a single call/text unless its urgent and then its still only financial.

He is coming over in the AM to meet the person buying one of our cars, so ill have to see him. Luckily ill be getting ready to work so I plan on dashing out the door. Normally I'd stick around and linger. Wish me luck! \:\)

lynn08 #1777097 06/03/09 01:56 AM
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lynn08 Offline OP
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Our house is officially on the market. Ive tried not contacting H but it seems like everyday we are having to discuss something like finances or the house sale...but, we haven't seen each other or hung out or anything...plus I keep the conversation light and never ask about us.

Each day I say "I wont talk to him today" but then something comes up. Oh well. I am doing the best I can

I feel really sad almost sick, that are house is for sale. It feels like another nail in the coffin

lynn08 #1778607 06/05/09 03:41 AM
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lynn08 Offline OP
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He called today and I didn't call back, he also emailed me and I didnt respond to that either! He was only contacting me about financial stuff anyway. He needs a good dose of reality what life will really be like without me. Im going to keep this up. its HARD!!! for example I was tempted to call but I came here instead ...step away from the phone! lol

lynn08 #1778656 06/05/09 08:28 AM
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That's right ma'am. Put the phone down and step away.

I'm sorry to hear how things are going. I think the biggest issue in your sitch is that if it goes through, you're not going to have any closure. You still don't know the reason why he's doing this. I know the feeling.

If you want to see a lively debate going on, you should check out what's going on over on my thread. I'd like your opinion too.

Stay strong. you can do it.

{{{stuck}}}


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
MrBond #1781579 06/11/09 03:59 AM
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lynn08 Offline OP
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Well, I cant believe its here and its happening

I was given the final divorce decree, after I sign it tomorrow, he will go to the court and have it finalized, so I should be D by next week

Its has not really sunk in. For the last 8 months it was always something "coming up" and now, its here and I cant believe it.

I dont really know what to do with myself. Im trying to move on but this is the hardest thing I have been faced with.

lynn08 #1781795 06/11/09 05:28 PM
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No you won't get closure, not until he's ready. That's what I think from mine anyway.

But I will say, D went through Tuesday, morning was rough and all through court. But after seeing my XW's emotionless face through it and then spending the evening with family and friends afterward, I awoke Wednesday to feeling of relief and it still continues.

for what it's worth.


Me 35/XW 33
S13 & S12
M: 10/17/98
OM & S: 07/08
D final 06/09/09
12/03/09 - 06/13/10 "Piercing"
06/13/10: Engaged to Re-marry 10/17/10
06/25/10: Expecting baby #3 2/14/11
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Jennlynnb08

{{{hugs}}} to you.
Just stay busy...... really busy... focus on life without him. This doesn't mean to be mean or nasty. It just means you don't really have the time for him. This is what you need to do for you. Completely detach and start over. Thank goodness there are no kids. Much much MUCH easier to move on after that. Meet someone really nice... actually meet lots of really nice people to spend your life with. Eventually, someone who thinks the world of you, and will never want to let you go, will find you. Hang in there...


There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
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