(((glam))) I am so sorry. I know this has to be devastating especially with how much you have put up with. I am sure more will be revealed in time...try to breathe, try to relax if you can. Hopefully you will be able to get the truth finally. Maybe it will force your H to take down the walls he has had up and then you can figure out where to go from there.
I found out my first H had a baby with an OW. I was in shock. I was 9 months pregnant at the time. You will make it through this no matter what this reveals.
Upside thank you so much. Nobody can imagine what I am going through. I stood by this man for the past 3 years believing all that he was saying and it's like I just got run over by a truck.
All the lies, all the secrecy, now we know why. How can my h like the person he has become. I feel so stupid for standing by him. My h must think I am such a stupid woman.
I feel like such a failure. Here I have been trying to DB bring my h home and he is off in la la land having babies. Wow, how could he do this?
I have been such a fool! Walked all over by my h. I guess he really never truly cared how I felt. How did he feel about ow? What was he doing cheating on us both? What kind of a man does that? Why did it have to be my h? Why?
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
You are not a failure or a fool. You are anything but. You tried to hold your family together. You acted with dignity and morality. You did the right thing for your children. I understand that you are feeling like you were used and taken advantage of but you can hold your head high and know you did the right thing. Your H on the other hand can not.
My first H cheated on both me and the OW. When I found out about the OW, I did everything I could to prove that my then H was not cheating on me and as I did that, the truth finally came out. I know how much this has to hurt you but try to find some relief in finally knowing more of the truth.
((((((GG)))))) We are here for you.....i believe you may even have my ph # still
1 take a deep breath
2 trot yourself to a L ASAP and find out how this impacts you especially since you the only working one in the M.
3 after the L, get a C..you cant and shouldnt go thru this alone, you have real big decisions to make now and you need a clear head.
4 Brethe again and remember we are here for you, find your family as well
Me 53 H 51 OW 25 Bomb may 06 left june 8/ 06 ILYBNILWY (twice!) 7/6/07 H wants to come home 7/21/07 H comes home 7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW now piecing in earnest
I am so sorry....just know this isnt about you ...even though you and your family are greatly impacted ....this is about your H.....I guess you could look at the bright side...he must not be planning to marry her...if she is going for child support....some H try and keep so much secret...
I'm very sorry to see you hurt this way, as I realize this is devastating. Please understand you are not alone, we are all here for you, and we feel your pain. Yes, you've been lied to, yes, you've been betrayed, yes, this a very rude awakening, and more the reason that you now know you need to protection yourself and start taking care of you and your family.
On one hand, this ow may be lying herself. If she is all that you say, this child may not be your H's. He will have to make the effort to prove this himself, and then protect himself. This is his doing not yours. This has no bearing on the person you are, the marriage you once had, or the life you lead... it's all about him, and we all know this.
On the other hand, if this is his child, you need to do everything in your being to protect yourself and your family. Starting with you, physically. Have yourself checked out for anything that could have been given to you. Most of us have been through this,and although it isn't pleasant, it is necessary. Then, you need to contact an attorney in order to protect your rights and your financial well being.
Next, honey, you have to drop the rope, let him go and allow him to deal with all that he has done. He's not being honest with you... and you deserve honesty! You are much more than this, you are worth more than this man can give you at this time. Right now, the marriage before you isn't worth standing for... so let it go, stop allowing this situation from dragging you down to levels that are destroying you. Right now, he is dragging you down, and he isn't interested in saving you, he will not give back to you, all that you deserve. You can't save him, you can't help him, he needs to learn to be strong enough to help himself, and you can't do this for him.
You can continue to stand for marriage, but a marriage you deserve, and this isn't it right now. Show the love you have by honoring yourself, taking care of yourself, and live as an example of strength, honesty, and all that you believe in, and until the day he can stand up straight in your shadow, pay him little mind, for you deserve a man who can be whole, honest, and responsible with and for himself.
Drop the rope, close the door, and love yourself.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you.........
glam, Please go eat something. It'll help you gain strength to deal with this. A thought cam to me -what if the baby isn't your H's and the woman is just trying to get money from him?
