need help fast

[courageous wife]

HELP! H called again this morning so I didn't answer. On my way out of town I see him and "someone" else in the truck. My first instinct was to turn around and foloow him but I didn't as I would not have been able to handle it if it was her! I am trying to not assume anything but can't help it. IF it was OW...HOW DARE HE BRING HER TO OUR HOUSE? If it was someone to help him move some things, why couldn't he call (he did but I didn't answer but had my cell and he didn't try to call it!) He saw me and didn't call so I have to take it as, it was her, he is sneaking in to get some things out of the house!!! What to do/

[whatdidido]

I'm not sure where you are at with your relationship, so I can't help too much.

If you are separated, and you know he is with someone else, get locks for the doors.

[P17]

You are assuming far too much. You are also mindreading. Its okay because we all do it. Look at the facts though. Acting or basing any decisions on anything other than the facts is a bad idea.

You saw H with somebody else. If it was OW, how do you know she was at the house. Is it his house too or only yours?

[courageous wife]

I didn't get an answer in Newcomers (loving distance)so I posted here...sorry, I know you don't have enough info to answer. Will post more info later.

[courageous wife]

I am not sure where to be...here or in newcomers. Yes, it was OW. AFter I calmed down, I called him and asked if he got what he needed. He said yes and I asked who was with him and he said, who do you think. Told him I was uncomfortable with her knowing where we live and he said he didn't think we would have a problem and then said that they didn't go in the house, just the garage. I repeated that I was not comfortable with him bringing her to MY house and that it was very disrespectful of him to do that and to not do it again. He said he understood and would not.

I cannot believe a word that comes out of his mouth. He left 12/30 after I used his cell phone and called OW. I didn't talk to her...just hung up. Stupid.

I have given him the talk about I choose this M but will not be in an open one and that if he chose to continue being with OW then he needed to own that decision to our kids and famiy and friends. That was 3 weeks ago. No word yet on his decision but it seems to be he has made that choice since he is flaunting OW all over the place. We live in a town of pop. 100. Chances of being seen with her are very good. He obviously has no respect for me or his kids.

I am just not sure where to go from here.....I still have hope that we can make our M work but it is slowly fading!

[courageous wife]

WhatdidIdo- I did stop today to buy new locks.

[K4D]

Wow, a town of 100. Ya, I'd say the chances of yall running into each other are quite high.

Are there any groups there that you can become part of to GAL? Do you live near a city at all? What do you do in a town of 100 people for enjoyment?

Kevin

[courageous wife]

Not a lot going on here. There are a couple of bigger towns within 30-45mi. I used to have a lot of friends that I went out with and did things but once I got married, I kinda lost touch with a lot of them. Being on Facebook has brought some of them back into my life and have some work friends I have been trying to go out with. I recently started going to church so have that. H never wanted to be involved in too much so I went along with that. I am slowly getting there with galing. Everything I did up until this point was always with H!

[newmama]

well, as difficult as it will be, now you do your 180s, GALing. Work on areas of improvement. Look good. Do some new activities/ hobbies or do old ones.DO NOT CRY or be angry (in front of WH or kids, too because the kids can say "mom is doing good! She started kickboxing or decorating cakes or running" when they talk to dad.

[courageous wife]

Thanks newmama...I have peeked in on your sitch a time or 2...I don't know how you have hung in there this long...you are a strong person! I know I need to keep doing that, 180's, galing...for me...this winter is so depressing! I have plans for tomorrow all day and got a call from a church friend/client to go to a movie on Sunday and a couple of things on Monday planned! Just need to get thru tonight! Both kids are gone and I am home alone! thanks for stopping by! I should probably not have som many threads...here's another story, loving distance and now this...I just panicked when I saw H with OW coming toward MY house and need help pronto!!!