I'm very very busy....but I'm also "taking a test drive" of living my life without being dependent on the DB boards...And you guys were my life line for months...from the time I woke up to late late at night...I've spent endless hours in here looking for hope and answers.
so it's like a month of mental vacation for me....healing time....processing time.
Had dinner with an old GF last night, we reconnected on FB ....she went through a horrible divorce few years back....and it almost destroyed her...she resorted to substance abuse to cope and was in really rough shape for a while. It was great to see her now...how much she grew as a person, how she caged her demons, cleaned up and blossomed into a lovely, wise and happy lady...what a wonderful transformation....she credits God for pulling her through...I credit HER for saving herself...with God's help.
Sounding good Mila!
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
Hi everyone SA & CW - thanks so much for caring I'm doing OK, just scrambling to attend to everything before I leave tomorrow. D is leaving today, have to get her packed and off to the airport. Have to cut the grass, do some accounting talk to our accountant do some banking, clean the pool and start packing myself and the list goes on....
On Saturday I was invited to dinner at our good friend's (married couple) house, this is the first time that I was with them since the split up. I was actually upset that they never contacted me...but the male friend was seeing my H and was taking him to the airport whenever he would go and see OW. I guess that they just felt stuck in the middle. Maybe it was for the best that we waited this long to see each other. I'm in control now, I'm not needy and crying as I would have been in the beginning.
We had a great time, I got there at 5pm and left after midnight...Of course we also talked about H....they can't believe what H has done...."you guys had such a strong marriage, why would he do this?". I didn't blame H or showed anger at him...just facts. They had a hard time understanding how could a previously sane, caring H & father behave this way. And they think that he will "crash & burn". My friends offered to pick-up my mail while I'm gone and to pick me up from the airport...great.
WH is arriving tonight few hours after D leaves, so he won't even see her. Accept for one text and FB message that D didn't reply to, he wasn't in touch with us until yesterday when he called D to say hi and told her that our friend (yes the same friend that I had dinner with) that was supposed to get him at the airport, can't now and he has nobody to pick him (and OW) up. D said that she felt sorry for him and offered that she will ask her BF if he can...didn't ask her if that's actually happening.
I received an e-mail from WH last night...telling me when he is arriving and wanting to "connect" about business and to pick-up his rent cheque.... I replied that it's OK that we can meet at Starbucks and gave him time that's convenient for me....well it's not really convenient tomorrow, but what can I do....not looking forward to seeing him
Hope everyone is doing good (((hugs)))
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
I hope you have a most wonderful visit with your Mom! It'll be just what the doctor ordered!
Too bad you couldn't just type up what H needs to know business wise and breeze in hand him the paper and breeze out again, saying sorry, don't have time for this right now. lol
Have a good trip! It will really help to be in different surroundings. It will give you a mental break.
Re: H's recent trip............I was single (unmarried, but had long-term relationships) for most of my adult life until I met XH (just never met the right person until H/XH). One of the things I learned from those relationships is that taking a vacation with someone was a good test for the strength of a relationship. Traveling can be very stressful and tells you a lot about how someone reacts under stress. It's quite possible that your H got to see a side of OW he hasn't seen before.....and that may not be a good thing for their relationship. There's nothing like jet lag and trying to sleep on an airplane to bring out someone's true nature.
Have a great trip! Refresh and replenish yourself.
CW, SA, GAG & M&H Thanks so much for checking on me
I had a great time with my family....in my honor they organized a family reunion at mom's cottage...got to see just about everyone in the family. Also spent a weekend with my brother in the Austrian countryside...lovely time...The whole trip was a bit bittersweet as I had to tell them about H. Didn't tell everyone just my mom and my brother. My mom is of course very upset, worried about me and D & our future and furious with H. She also said that by what I'm describing to her what has been happening with H she feels in her gut that H will "crash and burn" and from her experience these kinds of "mad love affairs" rarely have any future. My brother had similar thing happen to him...his second wife was a habitual cheater...his advice - "forget about the jerk, you deserve better". Well everyone has an opinion.....
While I was gone my husband was coming to the house despite me telling him that he doesn’t need too, that everything is taken care of. He was cleaning the pool, cutting grass, picking up mail....and by the tell-tell signs...pretty much spending lots of time there, sun tanning, making himself lattes and lunches, bringing his newspapers etc. When I came back, there was a big basket of fresh fruit, fresh bread, and dinner ready for us (D & I came back on the same day) with a nice note with a smiley face.....I had a business meeting with him today, where he called me sweetie and wanted to know details about my trip....very confusing.
If he is happy? Who knows.....his girlfriend's husband called me today and told me that there was probably some kind of a disagreement between the two “lovers” after they came from their Paris vacation (GAG you may have a point)....OW's H thinks that she wasn’t talking to my husband, because he kept trying to find her and kept calling her husband’s house to see if she is there (she no longer lives there)...so who knows what’s going on.
I will try to catch up with everyone's treads in the next few days...hope that everyone is going well.
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
