about a year ago my husband told me he no longer loved me last October he told me he may have never loved me at that same time he broke off all physical contact with me.My husband is not willing to try and make our marriage work he is not willing to go to counseling. He told me tonight he is thinking about a divorce. I don't know what to do when he is unwilling to try I don't want to be divorced. we have been married 19 years and have one child that is sixteen help how can I save my marriage
Share with the group what specifics are going on. What is your plan or do you need help with one? What were the signs apart from lack of physical intimacy. How about lack of emotional intimacy. How is that going, do you talk nicely, etc. As you are more detailed the person(S) on this board with the experience or in similair sitchs tend to offer advice and support.
Married:10 years D final 8/28/08 10 minutes is all it took Life goes on and DB was no small part in growing from the Divorce!
Well I got "the bombshell" a few weeks ago. Having already been through the DB stuff a decade ago, I got 'proactive' almost immediately. I made a number of mistakes that I don't intend on repeating this time around . . .including parsing the advice I get rather carefully. This ticks some here on the DB boards off actually. It's like they're looking for puppets to play with sometimes.
Too early to tell, but I'm already seeing positive signs, and some of what I've done is contra to what people might tell ya. In other words, look around the site. Don't take anyones word as Gospel . . . most times it isn't. You don't have to spill out the whole thing if you don't want to . . .even if that ticks some folks here off. Talk about what ya feel comfortable with to start. I'd also point out that some here are rather prone to snap judgments, be cautious.
In my mind, you might consider "playing along" a little, see what your hubbys reaction is, and try to be kind of stoic about it all, even if it's tearing you up. When he says he thinks you need to split, matter-of-factly agree he might be right (he might be, actually, but that's irrelevant at this point, in my opinion) See where that goes for a little while.
Good luck, be discerning here, and talk about what you feel like talking about, on your terms, don't let others here intimidate you into meeting theirs.
Life may be short, but . . . well . . . it actually IS short, now that I think about it . . . . particularly when compared to planetary formation and stuff.
