Well he just left. He told the Girls, they were speechless at first. The oldest asked why and the youngest cried then sat next to him.
I cried too, couldn't stop it. I watched as he packed. While he talked about some financial stuff. I wasn't real mean but I wasn't being real nice either asking him questions about where he is staying ect..,
I know I should not have done all the crying and asking questions , but now that it is over and I am done. I will and can be much stronger going forward and the next time we see each other.
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
so now that I have been served and he has moved out, What is my next step?
*I am going to call 2 lawyers today to set up meetings. *I am going to continue GAL. Although this may be hard because I want to spend as much time with my Girls as I can. I am going out with Girlfriends Saturday night, do I let him know, so he can come over here to spend time with them?
What else do I need to do?
Do I just go on ? Do I go dark on him ?
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
Shelby, surround yourself with lots of support.. Its what I am doing. Really helps. At this point I would suggest doing exactly as you suggested. GAL, drop the rope, go dark and only communicate info re children.
Also protect yourself re financially.
M 43 W 43 S15 S 12 D 10 ILYBNILWY ( Dec 2009) Sleeping separate rooms April 8 2010. Sep as of 07/14/2010 W moving out 07/31/2010 No OM confirmed ( yet)
The storm is over. It's time for you to protect yourself and your kids.
Be there for your kids and comfort them. It going to be hard on them as well.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I do not know if is a good thing or a bad thing, but probally a real bad thing.
My Mother in law, who I am very close to is getting involved now. She just emalied me to tell me she texted husband( her son) to ask questions about the Bills and whos going to mow he law and tell him how the kids feel abandoned.
I know she is doing it out of Love for me and the Girls but I am afraid it will just push him farther away if he thinks I put her up to it. and I did not have anything to do with it.
Do I tell her to butt out or do I let her go, It is her Son after all ?????
Me:43 H:43 T:20 YRS M:15 YRS Bomb: 6/9/08 Bomb#2 7/6/10 Served with papers at work 7/13/10 DD:14, DD:11
I have gone through so many of the same things you have - and feel like you do - not wanting a divorce wtih a husband that just wants out. They think the grass is greener on the other side. My husband is cheating on me, though, with a kid half his age and sees nothing wrong with it - denies it, even.
I would absolutely get a lawyer - you need to protect yourself and your kids. There is one thing I know - you can't change another person - thier actions or behavior - or thier mind. I have often thought the best thing might be for my husband to leave to see what he will be missing. I have heard many times when they leave, they ended up regretting it.
My best advice - advice that was given to me is take care of yourself and your kids and stop spending so much time and energy on trying to make him change - it will never happen unless he wants to. Please try to get legal advice ASAP - most courts have a Family Center where you can go for help, if you can't get a lawyer for yourself. What he did to you, just to serve you papers like that - that is the act of a coward. Someone who doesn't have enough guys to tell you what he was doing.
Good luck. TAke care of yourself and your kids.
Me:36 H:38 Together: 20 years Married: 16 years Kids: 13 & 10 yr. old Discovered affair: 1/10 H denies affair. Refuses to save marraige. Divorce filed: December 2010
