Yesterday a year ago my H walked out.. I honestly thought my world had ended, no my world had started, all my dear friends on here bouyed me up and encouraged me to GAL and to find what I wanted out of my new life..
From the word go I loved DB, I got the book and read every bit and put it into play, at times it was fun watching H squirm and other times it broke to me pieces to go NC for nearly six weeks when I had spoken to him every day for thirty years, but eventually although too long a story to tell he came home!
This weekend I went and spend the afternoon doing his hobby with him, it felt very strange knowing what a mess I'd been in this time last year and how different I was now!
DB helped me work on my fears, worries and my self esteem, I didnt realise how needy I had become and how some things had let slip which although I thought I was doing them so as not to be greedy ( I have an expensive hobby so spent little on myself) left me with very little respect for myself and well being.
Well to cut a long story short I know I already said that, but things are better than before still a long way to go on some things, still lots of talking to do, but although I was very apprehensive about this anniversary I found myself bemused at my happiness, the only time I fell apart was when H said "its ok Im still here" and I promptly burst into tears..
But most of all Im lucky to have a happy ending but folks even if your ending isnt so happy DB for YOU! It was and is the best thing I ever did for myself, thank you Michelle I will always be gratefull for finding your book and your website, and also to my friends, some have called time on their M's and no longer come on here, but for all of you Im very gratefull xxxxx
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
I am so proud of you and how far you have come. DBing for yourself has had so many positive outcomes for you. It is just a wonderful extra bonus that your M is doing so well too. You are an amazing person and you give so much to so many. I am honoured to know you and call you friend.
Well said, Rabbit! Sending you hugs and wishes for further happiness on your DB anniversary. It's great to know that there have been some gains for you on this painful journey. Your words will warm those who are in pain at this time.
Thought it was good to remind folks that DB tools are not just for hopefully piecing M's but keeping yourself afloat! Especially so if you are on your own.. I use nearly all my DB tools in some way or another every week, also found they helped greatly with S(22) actually allowed me to detach from him and we dont knock heads together no where near as much as we used to before H left!
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Rabbit, Glad to hear things are well with you. The Greek and I should be in London the last week in March '11. Love travelling to Europe especially to England.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Hey Lost Rabbit, Glad things are working out for you reading this makes me have some hope, because this month has been rough so far because our anniversary is coming up.
I'm just in a funk and feel the progress I have made for me is good, but don't know about my M. Well best of luck to you I will leave a link to my post if our have any kind words of encouragement that would be great...
