How To Tell The Kids

[DanF]

Back in the states and feeling pretty good considering everything. Now to pick-up the kids and watch the Packers Bears game with them tonight should be fun!

I do have a question though. If W starts asking about the trip, do I remain vague, gotta run GAL or do I tell her all about the great fun I had? Who knows, maybe she won't even ask.

Thanks for helping me out on this one.

[dday101798]

naaah, just "I had a FABULOUS time, and, gee, speaking of time, I gotta get going".

[edit] and just to rub it in, you could ask how her time as single mom went?

[pinhead]

naaah, just "I had a FABULOUS time, and, gee, speaking of time, I gotta get going".

[edit] and just to rub it in, you could ask how her time as single mom went?

This^

[Ready2Change]

Agree with Dday...

"WE had an AMAZING time...and, gee, speaking of time, I gotta get going"

FFing incredible

Extremely unbelievable

lol!

[Ready2Change]

Not to hijack but....

I got "intel" that MsR2C spent this past weekend in Vegas during her parenting time.

Last text message from me included "Hope you had a great weekend with the kids"

[Ready2Change]

I do have a question though. If W starts asking about the trip, do I remain vague, gotta run GAL or do I tell her all about the great fun I had? Who knows, maybe she won't even ask.

Hi Dan,

In the art of seduction, there is a section that details out the art of insinuation....works very well...

Almost done reading a book called "Messages" by McKay... I strongly recommend picking up a copy...wish I read it about 2 years ago....

[idontunderstand]

Welcome home, Dan.

Glad to hear the trip was great! I really envy your "exotic" vacation.

Now..........Back to work!

[DanF]

Wow, a lot sure has transpired here over the last week or so. not sure I am on board, but what can you do.

Anyway, things have really settled down for me now that we are no longer living together. There is no arguing because we just don't talk. The only time we do is when we are exchanging kids. Even then, very few words are spoken.

A couple of veteran DBers have told me they think there is still a good chance that W and I will get back together, but I just don't see it. There is no progress. Just each of us doing our own thing.

I did make a snide remark to some other couples at a soccer game last weekend when W offered to pick me up a coffee. When she asked if I wanted anything, like a cup of coffee, I just said, "No." After she left I said to the friends that I wasn't going to take anything from her. They all laughed. Dday asked me if I have a roll of duct tape. Guess I probably should just shut up.

I do have another question though. I have created a profile on Match.com and on one other site. Dday is telling me that this is a mistake that might haunt me and doom any chance at reconciliation. Others that I know and some recently on these boards have said that dating is perhaps what finally woke W out of her fog.

What do others think about setting up a profile on a site like Match? I haven't been on any dates yet, but I could see it happening. It also helps me to forget about my sitch and feel good about myself again.

I just don't know what to think exactly.

Thanks!

[DumpedforMIL]

what is your reason for creating a profile?
what are you looking for?
where are you at emotionally and mentally?

let's start there.

btw, what are these sandwiches you speak of?

Me.

[DanF]

Thanks for responding MIL. I appreciate getting some feedback on these issues.

what is your reason for creating a profile?

I created the profile so that I could start to meet some new women. I'm not a big barfly and don't really meet new women in my day to day routine. I am tired of being alone and even just talking with someone who seems interested would be validation and an ego boost for me. I think it would take my mind off my sitch and help me feel better.

what are you looking for?

I am not really sure what I am looking for exactly. An honest, caring person to spend some time with. Someine to make a connection with. Nothing too serious at this point. Just someone to have fun with. Maybe experiencing and learning from some new women may help me define what it is that I am looking for. I really haven't known anything other than W. I was young when we met. Never had any serious relationships before that.

where are you at emotionally and mentally?

Emotionally I still struggle with this at times. Mostly I am in a pretty good place, but I tend to slip back into the hole from time to time feeling sorry for myself. Mentally I keep telling myself that I need to recover and get on with life. This isn't the end of the world, even though it feels like it at times.

Since we have separated, there is very little contact between us and there is no pursuit from either end. I try to be cordial and that is it. I haven't forgiven her yet, but I am not really angry anymore either.

btw, what are these sandwiches you speak of?

Ahhhh......sandwiches! It is a metaphor for making love. I think Pinhead (not exactly sure who) started it a while back and it kind of caught on with a few of us. I haven't had a sandwich in a very long time and I am famished! I really miss having those.

I don't know, part of me struggles with this because I am not divorced yet, but she has filed and made it abundantly clear to me that she isn't gong to change her mind, so I might as well consider myself divorced, right?

Also, even if I want this to still work out, isn't it kind of pathetic for me to just sit here and wait for her? That is not showing her that I am able to move on and be fine without her. I have read on the boards that dating is what finally turned it around for many guys here and if not, at least they were heaapy enjoying time with other women.

I'm so confused. Maybe I would find someone better than W or at least more compatible with me.

Thanks!