Hey folks yes Im back, having spent a whole summer hols without access to a computer which H couldnt get his sticky mitts on Im back in business with a nice new shiny laptop!
Have been mooching round the board but a lot of you have moved onto new threads, so I'd love to catch up so throw me a few links and I'll look in on folks.
Update on me and H, well we have been back together for over six months now, things are going well and most of the things I'd set as boundaries have now been fufilled or are a work in progress, life will never be the same and in most ways is a 100% better so one could say it was all worth it,but on the other hand I am often saddened about things that were lost but you cannot grieve for them for ever!
Anyway love to you all look forward to hearing all your news x
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Its been so nice catching up on what everyones doing!
Bit of a rubbish night tonight, got home early from work and didnt go GAL as H said he probably be back for our usual friday night dinner out.. Nope not back and no blooming phone call, me thinks I want bother next week if he's out I will just go out too.
First week back at work so quite tired but in a funny sorta way exhilarated, got more responsibility than before although mostly cos my supervisor is a lazy wotsit but it puts me in a good light with my manager and its nothing I hate doing.
Had a fab achievement whilst I was on hols, did my first ODE event for those not horsey, its quite a challenge for some one my age, three individual competions in one day which all add up, didnt embarrass myself and it was a great sense of achievement was so chuffed with myself, strangely enough this time last year I had a similar but smaller achievement and it broke my heart not to be able to tell H, infact S told him and he did congratulate me but it wasnt the same, did think it would be better this year but I save all that wonderful feeling to myself lol!
One nice thing had a bit of time away with H and finally got my wedding ring back on, certainly gave me a sense of relief funny I always felt it might go pearshape until it was back on silly as it went pearshaped when it was on but what the heck..
Off to see what your all up too x
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Hey lost rabbit, Glad to hear things are good with you & you had a good summer!! I’m not on here as much as I use too, but wanted to say hi. Well not much has changed for my situation.
Not sure if anything will change at all & if it does it probably will be after the D. W still have deep feelings for OM & they may be seeing each other for all I know. This whole year has been a long & draining process; somedays are good & others I'm not sure where I stand at all.
Lately we have been talking a little more than in past months. Partly b/c I’m tired of being cold at times, & just trying to keep working at the forgiveness part. We are great friends not what I want, but can’t change her feelings either.
I’M just tired of being angry, scared, feeling hopeless, & a failure at times. I move to a new apartment next month maybe it's a new start.
I know I can find someone else out there, but there is no one like my W, so I guess that’s why I still have some hope. Well off to finish some school work talk to ya later.
Hi H147 as painful as it is Im glad to see you are moving on with things as best you can! Totally see where youre coming from on the tired with being cold front with W, personally for me if H had persisted in going I could never have been good friends with him, a) he had moved two hours away and b) I loved him too much to see him and certainly would have got far too angry at what he had destroyed to play happy families that said our S is a grown up so really wouldnt have needed contact.
It is painful moving on, but also if you ever got back together that is painful too, you might have won the battle but in a way you lose the war as you have to live with a lot of painful memories, Im six months odd back down the line and to be fair most of the time its good, but occasionally old pains set in..
You take care hope the move goes well for you and stay in touch.
Rabbit (())
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
At first was quite annoyed at having my time and dinner messed up, but about an hour later H phoned and after I'd said hello the first thing he'd replied was "oh its good to hear your voice" so I sorta guessed by now that he'd had a bit of a day of it and I let all my anger and frustration go.. Well it earnt me a good apolagy when he got home as he realised no one was curtailing his life just asking him for manners, which to be fair to him he'd got all caught up sorting stuff out, but next we agreed Id go with he wasnt going to get home on time and do my own thing. Daft thing is Id actually asked him if he was going to be able to get back and he had said "yeah should do"
The lovely thing is we talk now, he doesnt bottle things up, I dont panic and get frustrated, and things get laid to rest really quickly, dont know how we ever got to be so bad before but Im glad we arnt like that any more!
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
My gosh, you continue to be my idol! This is fab news and proof that any marriage can continue to grow once the partners are dedicated.
I have been rereading all my threads and I can't thank you enough for being one of my dearest friends and greatest supporters. Throughout all the garbage, you were always there rooting me on. I don't know how you could stomach all those things I told you! Anyhow, thanks again for being there for me for so long...
Wow H4L I never thought of it as being anything but a pleasure x
Having learnt not to be queen of the panic button it only seemed fair to pass the secrets on, and being able to share with you helped me to realise how much I had managed to change and what good things had come out of the changes..
You have come so far yourself and its been a privelege to watch you grow into the woman that you should be! None of us could ever have realised how manipulative your H was going to be but at least you have the peace of knowing you tried, you grew and now you are moving on.. So so proud of you hun xx
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Sorry if I chatting your ear off but thanks for listing & responding I appreciate it more than u know. Thanks for the luck moving looking forward to the move in a way. At least my S is really excited told him we would go out and pick stuff out for it W says she's happy too.
As far as the friend thing I hate it but we have talked more in the past 2 weeks than in along time even some joking & a little flirting too. I'm doing what I can to move on & forgive both of us and stop being angry about this whole past year with the Affair.
Well funny thing the other day W locked herself out of the house again & called me so i saved her again & we went in. W has been sick for a while & she broke out in tears cause she hates asking me for help! I said stop & come here and we hugged. I know it's nothing & things are going full steam ahead with the D but was it was nice.
I'm sure people think I'm crazy or stupid for still wanting to fight for my marriage. Instead of looking for someone else who does love me like she says she doesn't. Maybe I'm old school but until the D is final I don't really want anyone else; heck I still wear my ring!! I just feel that it's wrong to date or be involved while were still married even if she says it's over. It's nice to flirt, have company & chat with the ladies, but that's all right now.
Sorry to talk your ear off. I hope all is going well on your end glad to hear your having more good days than bad life's journey is long & strange I guess we never no what lies ahead. I do have a little hope but i should probably keep it locked up right now. Well back to work & gotta finish papers for school tonight take care H147. Sorry if spelling is off it's from my iphone.
