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#2109934 11/29/10 08:29 PM
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Just wondering how many of those WAS who continue in a relationship with the OM/OW actually end up staying in that relationship very long. We all know the relationships start off unhealthy b/c of the circumstances, so how many of them actually last a substantial amount of time?


M-32, WAH 32
D-7 months
Bomb of PA 9/25
WAH left 10/24
D Filed by WAH
DoneAfter10 #2109943 11/29/10 08:59 PM
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I read once and cannot currently confirm without posting links wink

That 80% of marriages that started as affairs do not last.

But, numbers and data all corruptable and heck sometimes made up...like what 76% of the time?

If you went soley by numbers Life shouldn't exist on Earth.
Its good for betting, but don't live your life by them.



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Jack_Three_Beans #2109966 11/29/10 09:54 PM
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My H has been with his mistress for 3 years. They started officially living together a year ago but prior to that they spent most nights together anyhow (we are legally separated of course).

I think the shine is wearing off because (A) he took a job that has him traveling about 90% of the time and (B) he wants me back in his life. LOL! Right!

Some WAS will stay in a terrible "affair R" forever due to arrogance and pride. I know three people that had affairs IRL and all three are married to their affair partners now and all of them have been married for 10+ years.

Based on my own experience, the people I know IRL and the large "in person" divorce support group I have belonged to for 3 years (run by amazing family therapist) I don't think affairs (or R's born from affairs) die as often as people like to think.

CityGirl #2109971 11/29/10 10:09 PM
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Well, for example I happen to be in that 20%, but I always shoot to be the 1 in (pick a number) anyway.



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet

Jack_Three_Beans #2110037 11/30/10 12:38 AM
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Quote:
Some WAS will stay in a terrible "affair R" forever due to arrogance and pride. I know three people that had affairs IRL and all three are married to their affair partners now and all of them have been married for 10+ years.

Are you saying the ones married for 10+ years have been there only due to arrogance and pride? (Those sentences may be unrelated observations, so I don't want to assume...!)

Four_More_Years #2110065 11/30/10 01:49 AM
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I think that people tend to forget about most of the affairs that go bust. There's no real significance to the failure of an affair in people's lives and nothing to remind anyone about the affair. However, when an affair turns into a long term marriage, well then you have a "successful" affair front and center where everyone can see it. The unsuccessful affairs just fade away. Most of the time we probably don't even know an "unsuccessful" affair occurred in the first place.


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