Punkin, I'm happy to see that you finally have gotten into your new home. Congratulatons!
As for your xh, he'll either get over it or it will fester for many years to come. You've done absolutely nothing to him and have been a very honest and graceful lady in all of this.
You'll get everything done in record time...
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks guys! I'm so happy in my little home I can hardly stand myself! Xh has to keep up pymts. on former house, but now I face a quandry. Insurance is in XH's name, a pickle he placed himself into. Now, with no one living in the home, the insurance could skyrocket. But that's not the topper. There is an arsonist working in the small sub-community the house is in. Mind you, lots of woods, very few people. Six places in the last two days. It makes me shiver to think about it. Two of the places he torched were an empty house and mobile home.
Do I warn XH of this? I know I'll be at fault either way, but I think he should be aware of the danger. One of the fires was on the same road as our house. Does anyone think I should take the high road and warn him of what is going on, or is it just "my responsibility"? Yes, there are still possessions in and around the house. I've been trying to clear it, but with 100+ temps, and by myself, it's been a slow go.
There's too much at stake in not advising him of what is going on in your former community.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Well, I took the high road. Emailed him and told him about the situation. Got the smart a$$ answer I anticipated. "Don't worry, it probably won't burn before it is auctioned off." Not that I regret taking the high road. Just amazes me that he can care so little about what was once his "dream house". Like it is a piece of dog poop stuck to his shoe.
Moved the last of the BIG stuff into the house this morning. I don't know what I would do without my friend T. It's 90 degrees here by 8 A.M. and he'll still come out and help a friend in need. They are showing my former house tomorrow, so I'll be out there bright and early packing and picking up to make it more "Presentable." Hurt my shoulder, but I was called into work this afternoon, and need to go in.
Thank you Chances. No, I know he is not anyone I have ever known or loved. He is, in my opinion, jealous and spiteful. His ego has always been a problem, but not he has to take the blow that Yes, I can go on without him and live a happy life. How can that be??
Many of us find that, after divorce, while perhaps not hanging in for the marriage that once was, we still hang in there for the person we know our XH's to be. I continue to do that, and pray for the day he accepts help and becomes everything I know him to be inside.
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
It really does work, that and the Serenity Prayer.