Not quite in midseason form...yet

[MadeToSucceed]

Yea I think you and jb are both right. I'll probably request that she just send a cashier's check in the future so that she doesn't have to worry about the timing of it being cashed when she's doing something else potentially.

[MadeToSucceed]

My W just texted me: Your money is there.

I simply responded: I appreciate you for working with me on this.

Don't expect to hear back from her. Off to noon Bible Study.

[MadeToSucceed]

This evening I'll be going to a discussion group for my DivorceCare class that usually takes place on Sundays. It's held each Wednesday as a follow up to whatever happened during the week since we met on Sunday. This will be my first time getting to attend the meeting. It's designed to give us an opportunity to work through some of the feelings of Sundays topic in a much more conversational setting rather than the structure of the workbook and video.

I'm looking forward to it. I may be the only guy again but I'm ok with that and the ladies are too. Like jb has said before, they seem to get something from hearing a man going through a rough situation and turning to God for the solutions. I'm hoping that it causes at least one of them to think about and realize that all men aren't bad and are willing to fight for their M...and to be honest, it helps me to realize all women aren't bad either.

After that I'll get to get my weekly massage to wind down my night. I have 9 prepaid massages left still so with me trying to work out a consistent 3 times a week, the mid week massage really helps keep the body in check.

[MadeToSucceed]

Last night's DivorceCare discussion class was good. I enjoyed it a great deal. We had some discussion and one of the ladies shared that she had been doing really well with her situation as it pertains to her H and that just when she thought she was in a great place she ran into someone that told her that her H had just been there with a OW. I couldn't help but laugh and share that I had a similar experience this weekend. Goes back to my belief that whenever you're starting to feel secure in something, that's where you'll be tested the most. We had a good discussion about it. It helped to receive some additional reinforcement that I'm going about things in the right fashion as well. I appreciated hearing that. There was one other guy there last night so I wasn't the lone ranger. His perspective helped me a great deal also.

I tipped the scale at 249 today. Haven't seen that since my college playing days. As ashamed as I am to say it, I was 290 on April 21st. I've been feeling better and better. Now instead of clothes being too tight they're too big. I'm going to continue to try to be creative in how I can get clothes that fit without blowing a bunch of money. In a way I kind of want to create a "new look" so to speak. Nothing drastic but maybe now I can wear some of the stuff I used to want to wear. I know that sounds kind of "girly" but I like to look presentable and there were times when I just didn't feel comfortable in my skin.

Today is a light day at work so I'm going to try to knock out a 2 page paper and study for a quiz that I have this evening. I'm also going to speak with my pastor this afternoon so I'm looking forward to that.

[MadeToSucceed]

My pastor had to cancel our meeting today. He had to attend a funeral. We'll meet next Thursday now instead. I'm going to use the time frame in which I was going to meet with him to get a couple things done...going to get my oil changed, drop off a pair of pants for alterations and maybe even a haircut if I can get in touch with my barber. I'll also try to work out BEFORE class this evening so that when I finally get home I can just crash. I'm going to have a busy day tomorrow so the more I can get done today, the better.

[cjackson968]

Nothing I post ever makes it to the forum... Just know I'm pulling for you in the background. I wish you well and will be here supporting you.

I've been there and know its a long road, just keep your faith and use this as a learning experience to be a better person.

[25yearsmlc]

MTS

hope you are having a good weekend. Hang in there... And way to GAL!!

((( )))

[MadeToSucceed]

Well it's been interesting since I last posted. I'll try to do it in chunks by day. Quite a bit of GAL'ing and a "development" of sorts as well.

Friday was a short day at work. I took my exam for a class during my lunch break. I feel pretty good about it and should have an A in the course. I had a few more pants altered on Friday as well. Slowly trying to transform my clothes into ones that I can wear without them falling off me. Friday afternoon I was invited by the corporate sponsors of the bowl game that I'm working with to a pre-game event. They rented out a restaurant and all of the big wigs of each university attended. While there I actually ran into a photographer who has taken pics of my W before. We chatted briefly. It was really great getting to talk to so many people there. I even talked to the President of the entire bowl game. He was extremely nice and seemed very interested in me and my background and gave me some great words of wisdom. I plan on sending him and several others follow up thank you emails today.

That evening I went to dinner with my friend (I'm in his wedding next month), his fiance, her mother and daughter. We had a good time and talking some about my sitch. My friend's fiance wants to talk to my wife. She's in her early 30s and has been divorced before and truly believes she could help my W with insight. She was pretty adamant about wanting to talk to her and said she wouldn't even be encouraging her to return to our M but rather trying to help my W see the bigger picture. I'm not sure if she is going to go that direction or not but I told her what she could possibly expect my W's response to be.

Friday night I went out with my bestfriend and actual ran into a mutual friend my W and I. She went to school with us and she's really the first person we both used to spend time with that I ran into unexpectedly in a public setting since this whole ordeal. It was kind of awkward for me because I'm weary of who knows what but I kept it light and fun and kept it moving. Later in the evening she found me and pulled me to the side. She flat out asked "Are you single?" I showed her my wedding ring and said no but I am going through a divorce currently. She looked me dead in my eyes and said "You didn't hear this from me but just know that you are handling yourself extremely well. It's admirable and you deserve better. I wish nothing ill on anyone but karma is a b***h. Keep doing what you're doing and leaning on God and you'll be alright." And she walked off. I didn't get too up or down off of it but inside it did make me smile to know that apparently people have taken notice of all kinds of stuff and that I am heading in the right direction still.

[MadeToSucceed]

Saturday morning came early and fast. I was at the stadium by 8am and I posted on twitter and fb that I was going there to work and was excited about it. I went up in the press box and had a meeting with the entire media team and was given my assignment. I was responsible for helping photographers check in and make sure they knew where to go prior to the game. I got up to go to the restroom about 5 minutes before kickoff and saw I had a text from my W.

W: James 1:17

I didn't respond. When I looked it up, this is what that verse said: Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

I didn't know what to make of it and it left me scratching my head for a minute. Had she seen my posts and that was her way of telling me something and if so, what? At any rate, I stayed even keeled. I never responded. When the game started I was responsible for making sure that everyone was properly credentialed that was on the section of the sideline I was assigned to. I basically just watched football from the sideline the whole game. It turned out to be a good one. I met some great people.

After the game I had to check the photographers out of the game. I actually bumped into another photographer for ESPN that had taken some shots of my W in the past at and had provided me with them so I could turn them into a gift. He offered to come take some shots of her one day and said he would be in touch. Sure hope my W wakes up because this would be great for her.

When I finally left the stadium it was late afternoon. I ran home, threw a bag together and drove to Houston. On the way I stopped to see my brother. He was sick and couldn't come to the game (Texans/Steelers game on Sunday). Kept on trucking and met up with some friends that evening. We went to a birthday dinner and then out for drinks with probably 15-20 people. It was a good night.

[MadeToSucceed]

Sunday morning came even faster. Another one of my good friends is part of the Texans championship tailgating team. Last year they went to the Super Bowl and won some huge contest and were awarded $15,000 as well as a sponsorship from a grocery store. Basically that means all their food and drinks are free at their tailgate and it is HUGE and they have a great spread.

As we got to the stadium I received another text from my W.

W: Are you busy?

This was literally as I was walking into the tailgating area so I gave myself a minute or two to make sure I stayed composed and didn't just react. 5 minutes went by and before I had a chance to respond I had another text from my W.

W: Have a blessed day!

I let about 20 minutes go by before I had to go meet someone at the gate to give them their ticket. As I was walking that direction I texted my W back and said "Was on the phone. Free now." Short and true. I never heard back from her. I kind of expected this. It felt like prior situations. Things didn't happen on her timetable so she got upset (I assume).

I went on with my day and had a BLAST! I ran into another college friend and she wanted us to take a picture together. I did and even posted it to my fb along with some other pics from the tailgate. I had a great time with my friends. It was a group of about 6 of us and the Texans won so it was a fun time by all. I went back and caught a serious nap at my friends house before eating something and hitting the road.

I stopped to see my brother again and to wash some clothes. I crashed on the couch and got up around 5:30am on Monday to drive back home.