Having read all your posts you are a real inspiration to me, my wife is planning on moving out in the next couple of weeks and the hardest part for me will be telling the kids (it even upsets me writing it!) but like you i need to stay strong for them. Keep posting it really is a help for others, my thread hasnt appeared yet but if i get half the support you have i will be a lucky man
Me: 39 W: 33 Son:7 Daughter:4 Its Over: March 7th 2013 Moved back home Mid June, trying to make it work
She is very torn however. She is very confused (as am I) and now says that she thinks she may have made a mistake. She told me she loved me 2 days ago (first time in months).
Show only PMA and confidence. W is unsure of her decision, and is watching you. Continue to be the H only a fool would leave.
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I still want my wife and family back!
Of course you do, and you may still have that. Be patient and stay the DB course.
Congratulations on the softball win, and best of luck in the tournament.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
Hey guys. Things have continued to be positive around W. We took the kids to an amusement park on Father's Day and had a really good time. She has continued to show signs that she wants to work on us but has never really said that. She bought me tickets to a baseball game for Father's Day which I love. She got me the same gift for valentines day (when things were really bad). The big difference is that for V day she bought me two tickets (I went with a buddy). Yesterday she had four tickets (so the whole family could go in July). Very positive step in my opinion.
She has not said I love you again since the move out day however. Thats ok though. Baby steps.
In all, our interactions have been going well. She now kisses me goodbye and will hug me. She actually held my hand driving home last night for a few minutes.
I know that I must keep my expectations very low but man it's hard to do when things are going well. But I can't mentally return to where I was 5 months ago.
Second round of the softball tournament tonight (W said she wanted to bring the girls out to watch but they have vacation bible school. Another positive sign.) If we keep winning, we will play three games tonight. Should be fun.
Thanks for the continued encouragement. Keep sending your good thoughts and prayers my way. Something seems to be helping.
M 37 W 36 T22 M14 D8 D4 8/2012 distanced BD 11/2012 (likely wants D. Feelings have changed.) W move out date: June 8th.
ME:51 W:46 M:25 S:22, S:20 Divorced 16/9/15 BD 10/12 W left 12/12 with OW, affair confirmed Nov/12. Dark since 6/13 I"m in a new relationship since Feb 14.
This is awesome news Grizz!! Keep up the good work and continue to keep being a better you. Sounds very promising
M 37 W 30 S 7 Together 10 years Married 9 years BD: 12/12/12(W filed same day) I moved to apartment 1/11/13 W and S moved to MIL 1/11/13 Peicing: 6/3/13 Reconciled: 7/2013 BD2: 4/20/16 still working on it
Keep those expectations in check. God knows they will trip us up.
M46,W41 D16,D18 M22,T25 BD 11/12 W moved out 01/13 Piecing 10/13 Divorced 01/15 "Whether you worry or not has no affect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go, and making changes can." UrWorthy
Nice to hear about these small steps. Remember no expectations, some of the motivation is probably guilt, but in my opinion it also means that deep down she feels something for you.
Just getting caught up on your sitch and things seem to be moving nicely.
Remember to remain patient and stay YOUR course. Remember what got you here and try not to read into anything she is doing as meaning more then it does.
Let her come to you and make sure you don't start pursuing her.
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
Me-48,W-51 M-22,T-24 S- 18,16,9 Feb-Jul '11 Away from Home, after initial B date Aug-Dec '11 Back at Home on couch Dec '11-now Same bedroom, room mates only Dec '14 W files initial D paperwork
She has continued to show signs that she wants to work on us but has never really said that.
Grizz, this isn't going to be easy for you to hear, but I think it's really important for you to detach from your W and double down on your GAL efforts. Right now your W is confused and she's trying to have it both ways- establish her new life plus keep you on the hook in case her new life doesn't work out. You are plan B. Plan B is a crappy place to be. Don't make yourself totally available to her. Be scarce. Be mysterious. Let her wonder what you're up to. It may seem like she's on the verge of an epiphany, but she's not. She's just going through the normal second-guessing that WAS's go through when they leave. Don't get your hopes up, remember that you're still in a marathon.
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She bought me tickets to a baseball game for Father's Day which I love.
Great baby steps! Just remember, celebrate baby steps internally but continue with your DB'ing externally.
