They win.. I am broken

[Limbowife]

Hi Bright. You are absolutely right. And somewhere inside my head I know it. I just need to put it back into action. I am so upset with myself because I think I was moving forward and all this new drama has knocked me on my butt. Thank you all for your patience with me. Take care.

[Bluedown]

Limbo,
What are you doing to GAL? How is your garden? What makes you happy? I started working out every day again 100 pushups, 100 situps, 50 lunges.....I started watching TED talks every night. I love reading the WSJ and listening to NPR every morning
GAL so that you can withstand your husbands rollercoaster ride. What makes you happy? I'm going to Vegas with a co-worker next month Planning a trip to Riverwalk in TX later this year
You can do this Limbo.... If I can than I know you can. I was laying in bed all day just a couple of months ago wishing my life would end. One minutes, One hour, One day at a time. My sister tells me every day to set small goals each day and complete them. Before you know if you've accomplished big things. You can get through this Limbo. God made you special for this very life.

[Thumpered]

I know its a roller coaster ride, but you need to act like your standing in line for a hot dog instead. Hang tough, it gets easier, I promise.

For now, just remember the more you let them two have their thing, the faster he's gonna come to his senses about her. If you allow yourself to play his game with him, your just pushing him back to her.

Stand strong!! You can do it.

[RosaLinda]

gee I'm sorry your H is back with that Junkie Whore Limbo. That just shows you how NUTS HE is! Have the police dropped the investigation? Did they bother to investigate JW at all? How are you doing?

[Limbowife]

Hi Blue. Thanks so much for your support. You have been so good to me. I think it is awesome what you are doing for GAL. I am so proud of you. I am actually going to get my garden in shape tomorrow. One of the things I love is my yard and I have let it go so much. It is an overgrown weed patch. So starting tomorrow that is one of my major goals. I like the idea of one minute, one hour, and one day.

Hi Thumpered. You really gave me something to think on. I don't want to play this game with him and only I can stop myself. They have been together almost 18 months H has said and he thinks they have a future together. So they can share their own drama but I need to take myself out of that. I just pray that H realizes what a loser she is eventually.

Hi Linda. There is really nothing the police can do with no proof. And she knows what she is doing because she has quite the record. Prostitution, drugs, assault, trespassing, child endangering, etc. But of course all of that is only because of her addiction according to idiot H. He doesn't know half of what her record is and won't believe me when I tell him.

I am relying so much on my faith and the support of all of you is simply overwhelming. I wish I could meet you all in real life and give you all giant hugs. I know I have said it before but I could not do this without you.

The last few days H has said he is very suicidal and can't go on like this. H keeps texting me and telling me how bad he feels and how hard it is for him. Or he will just stop at home and ask for some iced tea and a snack and want to talk about how miserable he is. Why not tell JW?? The man is losing it I think.

As for the mortgage I am so very afraid of losing our home. We didn't qualify for the one thing we tried so we have one more option. H says he will do everything he can to save it. But as I have said if his lips are moving he is probably lying.

Thanks for reading this far. I think of all of you and keep you all in my prayers. I will be reading later tonight getting caught up on your sitches. Take care my friends and have a good night!

[RosaLinda]

How was your weekend Limbo? Any drama? Your H does seem to be losing it ("The last few days H has said he is very suicidal and can't go on like this. H keeps texting me and telling me how bad he feels and how hard it is for him. Or he will just stop at home and ask for some iced tea and a snack and want to talk about how miserable he is. Why not tell JW?? The man is losing it I think.") but par for MLC I think. It seems to be such a mixture of childish selfish actions and depression.

But how are YOU doing? And your kids?

[BrightFuture]

Limbo, how are you doing? Your H is putting his burden on you. He is messed up right now and he is definitely looking for your sympathy and support. You need to separate yourself from his drama. Let him cook on his own. Don’t take anything personally right now. Stay calm and positive.

[Thumpered]

Whats the old saying, sometimes you need to let them hit rock bottom before they can see light at the top? I know its tempting, but I think imo, its better to let him fall on his own face because of his own choices. Good luck

[Limbowife]

Hi Linda, Bright, and Thumpered.. Thank you so much for checking on me. I am so mixed up about everything. I have never seen H like this in my life. I am scared for him and for the kids and I. The kids do not know about his suicidal thoughts. H stopped over tonight to work on his car and he said he is just done with everything and is giving up. Then he asked if I would just sit with him in the yard while he drank his iced tea.

He just sat there with his head in his hands for a while then finally said why aren't you mad at me yet and why don't you hate me yet?? He just keeps saying that over and over. That phrase has come up many times from him. I just said that people are not perfect and they make mistakes and I just didn't want to be the kind of person that hates people for that. Do you think that was the wrong thing to say??

Then I changed the subject and we talked about pizza of all things. I am really trying to keep a PMA and keep busy and try not to think about this drama all the time.

He texted me last night and said he just wanted to be alone right now because he has a lot of thinking to do. I am really afraid he will do something stupid. I did tell him that he can't put the kids thru that because they are going thru enough.

H won't take any kinds of medicine to help with it and he said he won't talk to anyone. I could not be doing any of this without the medicine my doctor thankfully put me on for now. He lectured me a while back about getting hooked on drugs like Xanax and anti depressants. . Really maybe somebody should have told the JW that you think?? Kept my mouth shut though. I get bonus points for that right : )

He said something like how it's all bad things happening to him and not the changes he wanted or something like that. I said then make other changes and he said I did that already and look where I am at.

He seems to be thinking a lot lately and maybe not liking where he is at. I know that is mind reading. I know better.

But then a few days ago he brought our daughter some colored pencils(she likes to draw) and our son a magazine he likes. He has never done things like that. And yesterday he brought me some lemon candy that I really like. What??? No wonder I am just about crazy.

So I am still plugging away but I have to not get sucked into this-- whatever this thing is-- he is in. Did that make any sense??

Off to try and get some sleep. That has been so hard lately. Okay enough whining. Take care my good friends.

[Thumpered]

I think the DB'n is working, nice spin on the PMA considering the circumstances. He's really trying to work thru his issues, let him at his own rate. Your doing great. Make sure your not overly doing the PMA if he's in that state of mind. I know its a fine line, but that's why its one of the 37 rules.

I understand being worried about his suicidal thoughts, but it sounds like he's coming to you, which allows you to keep an eye on it. You know him prob better than anyone, and if it looks like its really about to cross the line, grab hold and call 911.