Well one thing is for sure, we can't work on the M if OM is still in the picture.
Agreed
As far as exposure goes I dont think that here on MWD's forum it is recommended although about a year ago I spoke to MWD on FB about her new book that she is writing about infidelity, so when it comes out we will have a definitive stance on what she thinks about it.
My suggestion is to work on YOU, and be the best that YOU can be.
OM leaving the picture does not equate to her coming back to you. You're better off working privately on what you need to improve than "outing her" to people outside your marital relationship. Most people will assume there are more sides to the story than they'll ever know, and your W will most likely feel pressed to defend and stand by her choice.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
YEah exposing OM will only cause your WAW to continually defend her reasons for leaving you...whereby reinforcing them in her mind through repetition. The more private you keep the more embarrassing issues, the better your relationship/possible friendship with her will be. Causing her more anger towards you now is the last thing you want to do and I personally don't believe that exposing OM accomplishes anything but possible satisfying a need for vengeance against her. My WAW and I just tell people we grew apart and it didn't work out, it's not really anyone else's business as to the what's and why's of the split. It keeps something "secret" between you two, which, after all, is what friends do that you confide in.
Last edited by ItHurts; 06/02/1402:46 AM.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
