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#2478556 08/13/14 03:14 PM
Joined: Aug 2011
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Hello everyone been along time since I visited the site.

Well long and short of it been M 14 S from my Wife for 3.5 yrs D for 2.5 and we have 2 children together so we had very minimal contact with each other for about a year then slowly talked and then it turned into us hanging out with each other and this past summer we where together almost every day. Things were great we had a lot of fun with and without our kids. With this being said I started to develop feeling for her again and then all of the sudden she started to get scared and back away again. So I went to her and tried to talk with her and she said "Don't get me wrong I enjoy our time together for sure" but I don't want to get back together with you I just want to be friends. Not sure how to handle this when I started to fall for her again. She says she loves me but not in love with me. But wants to spend all of this time together and act like a happy family. I want her in my life but not sure if I can just be her friend and be around her when she starts to date.

Do I try to maintain this friendship?

Do I walk away from her?

Joined: Jun 2008
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"Do I try to maintain this friendship?

Do I walk away from her?"

You can maintain a "friendship" with her, but one not as deep as you'd like. Move on. You haven't really walked away from her.


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
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You have to decide by yourself.

I am in a similar situation.
She calls me two times a day and looks discontent when I don't call her. So, I am always available when she needs me.
I know that time could change everyone and everyone's decision.

My personal opinion is that there's no need to interrupt the friendship. If she starts dating just tell her that you couldn't continue being around. Or if you prefer do not tell her anything and stay away, pretending that everything is ok.
Meanwhile, if a lovely woman come up in your life do not miss the chance.

Hope I was helpful.

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Thanks for your input guys.

But I decied to move on she just keeps saying things like "what the heck you had your cake and ate too for 20 years" why can't ?"

One of my buddy's said so are you guys back together now she said "NO". He said friends with benefits her response was "his benefit is me getting along with him and that's it."

And she is always bring up the past and I can't do it anymore she won't forget about the past minor mistakes I have made so I'm just going to be civil and deal with our kids as needed. In not living in the past I made mistakes and apologized to her for them so it's over in my heart no need to dwell on it any further.

I don't like how this feels neither does she or our kids but I think it's best for my sanity!


Moderated by  Michele Weiner-Davis 

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