I joined DB 14 years ago tomorrow. It was 2 months after Ex left with no warning, got a DUI and told me he wanted to live with maggot. We had just celebrated our 25th Anniversary. I think it took me a couple of years just to recover from the shock. And FOREVER to stop being angry.
Last night my daughter, Ashley, posted a photo of my ex in a Zombie Halloween costume. I stared and stared at that pic and seriously could not see any resemblance to the man I had been with since I was 15! I can finally say he was someone I once knew. Someone who hurt me badly. But someone I let go of!
I have a wonderful life because I chose to. Yes, I have had more than my fair share of problems. But I set goals for myself and refused to be consumed by the things I had no control over. I was, fortunately, able to retire at 54. I met a wonderful, calm, quiet, caring man 2.5 years after my marriage ended. We have been together for 11 years. He restored my faith in men and brought back stability and peace to my life. But he does not "COMPLETE" me. I am complete and whole on my own. And in fact - I spend a lot of time without him. Although my best time is with him.
It took me a long time but I have finally stopped posting here daily. I have stopped coming to read daily. I am lucky that I have many of the hundreds of good friends I made here on my FB. I am happy to keep up with them and watch them move forward too.
Tommorrow I am off to Disney World with my disabled son, Ryan and his personal support workers. Interestingly, Gabby's Mom is also arriving at Disney World tomorrow. And YES - we are finally going to meet! I am very excited about this, having "known" her on here since Gabby was born. And chatting on FB with her and watching Gabby grown. It will be a pleasure to have a drink and watch the fireworks in the Happiest Place on Earth.
This morning I am watching the sun rise in Florida. I'm in the condo I bought 4 years ago. It was my 10 anniversary post D gift to myself. I feel blessed. I made the choices that brought me to this place. And I am so grateful to be where I am.
I will continue to check in here once in a while. I hope I somehow inspire, support and commiserate with you. I care about DB friends who I was "in the trenches" with and the new people who find themselves here. Do your best. Stay true to yourself. Remember that the kids always come first. Don't badmouth your ex to them. And make goals for yourself. With or without a partner - YOU CAN DO IT!!!
It sure is a Small World After ALL! & I have a feeling that it won't be the only time we will meet up. I'm glad you also got to meet Ryan, ride with us on SSW and we got another dinner and fireworks! You've done an awesome job with Gabby - she's my kind of girl! Ryan just arrived home. He did so well this week - alert and happy and Disney went above and beyond to make everything awesome for us! Barb
