You'd think she might choose another way to walk to work. Right past my window every morning, really?
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Hi NYGal, Friends knowing anything always backfired for me. Under the inexplicable behavior and anger is guilt, and when you fuel the guilt (other knowing anything) it tends to turn to anger and more entrenchment in being right about her choice... the less people that know, the easier the path back for her. Let her be the one to explain... you take the high road. Be around your friends, if you can, without commenting.
Right past your window? Really? Sounds like she does not realize that she has lost you yet..
Take care
Me(f): 51 W: 41 DP:8 M:3 T:10 "W not happy" 7/11 D final: 8/13
Make sure she doesn't know you noticed her walking by your window. You're moving on.
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
I won't let her know I saw her. She must be aware though. She did the same thing yesterday on her way to a meeting. Granted, it's the most direct route, but she could go around the building and it would only add about a minute to her walk...
I'm having such a hard time concentrating.
I'm planning to go to the basketball game tomorrow night, and I do believe she'll be there. I guess I should just sit with friends and try to ignore her and OW? They probably won't be sitting together since they are still mostly hiding their affair. I hate this, I can't tell you how much I hate all this. These games used to be so important to me.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Hi NYGal, Friends knowing anything always backfired for me. Under the inexplicable behavior and anger is guilt, and when you fuel the guilt (other knowing anything) it tends to turn to anger and more entrenchment in being right about her choice... the less people that know, the easier the path back for her. Let her be the one to explain... you take the high road. Be around your friends, if you can, without commenting.
I really like this advice. Maybe I shouldn't go to the game. Lots of friends will be there, but I don't really want to interact with them. I shouldn't talk about the affair with our friends. I should keep the path clear for her to come back to me. They'll know anyhow. It will all come out. But how do I keep these friendships and not let them know what's really going on? Part of me still feels the need to let everyone know what a scumbag W is, but that won't help me get her back, will it?
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
I won't let her know I saw her. She must be aware though. She did the same thing yesterday on her way to a meeting. Granted, it's the most direct route, but she could go around the building and it would only add about a minute to her walk...
Wait....what?
Your new place is on her way to work, and you think she should walk around it? Just to avoid the chance of running into you?
Just like you wandering around OW's office area, this doesnt make a ton of sense to me. What difference does it make how W walks to work?
I cant tell you how much I hate this. This makes it seem like it's a game between you and OW. The real struggle you need to have is with yourself. These words give the illusion of you dealing with external forces to "win" back W.
I just dont think this is about that. Sure, OW and W might break up tomorrow and your W will come back to you looking for forgiveness. Then, great, you did those things above.
But why would you expect that new relationship to be any different from the old one? How are you different from two months ago? Until you can remove your view from the W/OW relationship and internalize it to you, I dont see why any new relationship would be different. And we know how that relationship is going.......
