Quoting jethro: My W didn't really wanting me to coach her. She didn't want me to mention her anxiety AT ALL...just wanted me to chatter away...
Same here. My "coaching" is seen as intrusive to my wife, and she sees it as me going into my "counselor mode". It seems to make her feel worse about herself.
Just time together seems to help, along with dragging her butt out of bed to watch some of her favorite videos. A good dose of "Rocky Horror Picture Show" can take her into a happy place most of the time! The only problem with that is she scares the hell out of the son and the dog when she gets up and starts doing the "Time Warp" again!
JJ
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No really sure Jethro, they're kinda in disarray ... more of a feeling of wading in the surf trying to avoid the undertow. So I've been trying to keep preoccupied and why I haven't added anything here in a few days. I guess I need to get myself a virtual surfboard...
KAW..just wanted to drop in and say i am thinking about you and your wife...you have a heavy burden to carry..has your w ever tried any kind of yoga..I took a class and it is sooo relaxing...you can get books on some of the simple poses..just a thought..wish there was something magic to help you and her on this unknowing journey that you are on.. just know that we are here for you. Sue
I'm sorry you are going through a rough patch. I think your wife's comment about you working so hard last year so that you don't become separated was a nice acknowledgement of your efforts.
Thanks, J ... now I'll need to learn how to ride it ...
I'll be OK, I can feel I won't get swept away with the undertow and I already feel myself heading for the shore.
I don't know if my W is being intuitive about my thoughts or what, but she made a difference this week. She's much more positive lately despite some pain (pulled her back out - the "... in sickness & in health..." part of our vows have been thoroughly been tested though out the years) , and has returned some acts of service that she hasn't done for nearly a year.
Gotta cut this short and I gotta go on an outa town business trip tomorrow, so I won't be around much for a little while.
Well the trip was postponed... The trip was to a not so nice part of New Jersey (Newark area - hope that doesn't offend anyone here? ) so I was not looking foward to the drive, especially with the threat of the starts of yet another storm tomorrow.
... but still gotta go, have to get to bank before it closes tonight.
Just checking in..haven't heard from you for awhile..did you end up going on your trip? Hope your w is doing better..or at least not so many panic attacks..does she ever want to seek out other areas of help? Acupuncture, yoga..support group..something new to try. I give you so much credit for having the strength to deal wiht this..but then marriage vows are for better or worse..in sickness and in health...wonder if too many couples forget those vows that were made.. Check in when you have time.. Sue
, and has returned some acts of service that she hasn't done for nearly a year. 
The trip was to a not so nice part of New Jersey (Newark area - hope that doesn't offend anyone here?