Keep your chin up dancin man....if you chat with her...don't push, just give her your side of the story, and how you have been working on changing yourself. Good luck....
H-32 Me-29 T-10years M-4yr (10/04) Me- WAW 1/07 I filed for D 2/07 D put on hold 5/07 H re-files for D 9/08 WOW! trying MC 10/08
"Work like you don't need the money, dance like nobody is watching, love like you've never been hurt!"
Thanks for the example -- I never get tired of hearing those kinds of success stories! I'll try to stop by your thread sometime soon and check up on you and how you're doing.
christarn,
I would love to mention something about my working on changing myself, but I'm not sure how best to do this. It is a DB principle to show them change and not tell them, so I'm curious as to how I can slip this in and have it be genuinely recognized and understood.
Its great to hear how well you are doing. Remember ( stuck record here ) that this stuff may not have any immediate effect, but she sure will be noticing. I realy do think you have the right attitude and your "lindy Hop" dancing is awesome for your PMA. I actualy had to google search lindy hop to see what you were up to. Keep the changes going and the expectations low.
I saw on Nomo's thread that you are landing in Orlando at 4:45. My plane gets in at 4:50. So, I guess I will just look for the dude that is dancing all over the airport and know that it is you.
GD, I'm with Dave. A google of Lindy Hop is in my future.
You said somewhere earlier here that "you've only managed to be nice" to your W. Now, while I'm not going to be taken in by your wiles and charm, you do seem like you've got a bit more wit than you're giving yourself credit for. I've skimmed through a number of your threads and it's been there from the beginning.
Show your W what you're showing this board.
First dance lesson was last night at Arthur Murray. Individual lesson, so went over the waltz, fox trot, and a tiny bit of Swing. My teacher, a very attractive young lady -- talk about a good thing for the PMA -- was pleasant and I had a good time. Going to go for the next 3 months and see where i am from there. Going to learn the basics of a bunch of things -- waltz, swing, little latin dancing. Looking forward to it. I'll probably journal on my day yesterday on my thread later.
BD
My latest
Me: 36 W: 35 2 D: 9 and 5 T: 16 years M: 12 10/4/06: Bomb 10/5/06: Ended A 4/22/07: ILYBNILWY
Remember ( stuck record here ) that this stuff may not have any immediate effect, but she sure will be noticing.
I'm not sure exactly what you mean by "this stuff," but I'm assuming it is the traveling, dancing, and upbeat attitude (maybe even the physical changes too). I agree with you -- the effect may take some time, but she will be noticing as time goes on. I still think she sees my changes as short term and only here to try and win her back. I think the real test for me in her mind is whether or not I keep the changes going post-D. And, when I do, I think that is when she might just begin doubting her decision... Oh, and what did you think of the lindy hop info/pics you googled? Pretty sweet stuff, eh!
When I was at my W's friend's house (the girl engaged to my good friend) the other night for dinner, I continued to throw out the "charm" (as sunny would put it) -- you know, all part of my Master Plan . Friend's fiance just broke a bone in her hand the day before, so I came in the kitchen and offered to help and she gladly accepted. I peeled the shrimp, cut up the potatoes, minced some garlic, sliced the onions, etc, and did so quickly and efficiently (I used to do occasional prep work at a restaurant years ago). She was like, "Damn! You're hired!" I responded with "Yeah but work this good comes at a high price. I hope you pay well!" We all laughed, and the pleasantries continued throughout the night. Continuing to plant positive seeds where I can. Just thought I'd throw that bit of info in -- forgot to on my previous post about it.
Kat,
Quote:
I guess I will just look for the dude that is dancing all over the airport and know that it is you.
Hey my teacher friend! That's great that we're all arriving at roughly the same time (where are you flying in from?)! Yeah, I'll be the one swingin' girls left and right throughout the terminal while simultaneously throwin' out my jazz hands (just got a hilarious visual)! Are you sure you want to be seen with that ? What is your plan for transportation when you get there? Can't wait to swap some classroom horror stories with you!
H,
Quote:
Now, while I'm not going to be taken in by your wiles and charm,
LOL! Oh, come on H -- try as you might, you know that you can't resist! Thanks for the vote of confidence btw -- don't know how to show W though. I think I'm focusing too hard on NOT being what I was instead of simply showing her who I am now. Wow. That was just a huge revelation! Making note to self...
How'd you like your first dance lesson? Lots of getting used to I'm sure (it took me three lessons to get the basic lindy steps down -- caution: slow learner here). You're learning lots of different dances -- you're gonna be the man if you stick with it! What kind(s) of swing will you be learning? East Coast, West Coast, Lindy Hop? It's definitely nice to have a cute instructor too -- makes you work a little harder! For my performance team practice tonight we begin shifting our focus from Lindy to some Latin dancing (not sure which kind though). I'm excited, but a little bummed too. Oh well, I'll still have my Lindy Hop Monday night dances for the Lindy!
GD - I have been meaning to get on your thread for days, but I have wanted to find a block of time where I could concentrate on your letter to W. With the kids this week and last (plus IC and JC, mega-journaling entries, exercise, etc., etc., etc.), I have been working hard. Pretty exhausted really. But I wanted you to know I haven't forgotten, and I will be back before too much longer.
Nomo
M 39 W 39 M'd 10 yrs; T 14 yrs S7 D4 Bomb 5-8-05 W not working on M 1-22-07; EA 2-22 DB 4-10 S 6-11 No more C Link
? What is your plan for transportation when you get there? Can't wait to swap some classroom horror stories with you!