The Beatles... Seems like you can always find one of their songs that will fit...
The long and winding road That leads to your door Will never disappear I've seen that road before It always leads me here lead me to your door.
The wild and windy night That a rain washed away Has left a pool of tears Crying for the day. Why leave me standing here? Let me know the way.
Many times I've been alone And many times I've cried, Anyway you've never known The many ways I've tried.
But still they lead me back To the long, winding road You left me standing here A long, long time ago Don't keep me waiting here Lead me to your door.
But still they lead me back To the long winding road You left me standing here A long, long time ago (ohhh) Don't leave me waiting here Lead me to your door.
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
I let my dogs sleep with me last night since I knew that waking up this morning was going to suck. It still sucked, but they didn't let me lay there and wallow in misery. I gave them their Christmas presents and they were really happy, so that brightened my morning up some. Then I took off for my parents house.
It seemed strange being at my parents without W. Everyone seemed a little sad, or maybe that was just me projecting my emotions onto everyone else. Also, family picture time was not something I wanted to participate in this year. I don't really want a reminder of the Christmas where my W and I are separated. Other than that it was actually a pretty good day.
I called my W when I was on my way home like I told her that I would. She was sleeping and was feeling sick, but she still said that I could stop by. When I got there she didn't look so good. I got a hug though. We talked for a while about family stuff and what we got for Christmas. I stayed for almost two hours. It seemed like she didn't really want me to leave, but I had to because of the dogs. I got a couple more hugs and a kiss or two. I know this is against DB, but I had to try for a little Christmas miracle. I told her ILY as I was saying goodbye and I got and ILY2 right back. Not quick enough like it was just a reaction. I think that she meant it. I tried to get her to commit to doing something later this week, but since she was feeling sick I didn't really push. We'll see if anything comes of it.
While I was at her place her dad called me to thank me for the gift cards that I got them. We ended up talking for a bit and it was really nice. I called it right when I said that he was uncomfortable because of my parents when I saw him at the Christmas play. He apologized for not talking to me more. I told him that I understood. Right after I hung up with him he called my W. He didn't know that I was at her apartment. When she told him that I was there he asked if we would come over to their house. Her parents must still like me and miss me. That feels good.
One more thing. W wanted to call my parents to thank them for the gifts that they got her. She was scared that they would be mad at her and yell at her on the phone. I assured her that they would be nice, so she called. They had a short but pleasant conversation. I think this was a positive accomplishment in my situation.
So overall, Christmas was pretty good, all things considered. It obviously could have been better, but I know that it could have been a whole lot worse.
Peace, B
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
B...glad your day was ok. Yeah it could have been a lot better I'm sure. If Santa had answered all of our DB'ing prayers and brought our S's back (wrapped with a bow under the tree!) we'd all be a whole lot happier. But instead we have to look for the small wins and celebrate our blessings.
"The Long and Winding Road"....that it is. Hopefully next year well be looking back at this Christmas as a bump in that road.
J~
M 35 H 29 M 4 yrs T 9 yrs D 3 S born 10/19/07 Bomb 09/10/07 Separated next day OW - broke up and H moved out 09/07/08 Status - still figuring this out
Good song B. I'm glad you talked to your ILs. M FIL called me earlier in the week to make sure I would be at the family's Christmas. He told me there aren't many people he likes but he likes me. I actually thought he would be taking sides w/ H because he did that once before we were married. He only knew his side and believed it all. I guess after the time and love we have invested, our ILs realize that we deserve their love and support.
My H was sick too. I have read that on many of threads. I think the stress of Christmas is harder on the WAS than it is on us. Probably much harder than they expected too.
Well today ended up being better than I expected. W called me a few times while I was out working on my car. She was in the area and wanted to meet for lunch. She had a doctors appointment since she is sick. So I accepted and we met at for soup and sandwiches. I paid for it and she seems appreciative. Afterwards, she had some time to kill so she asked me if I wanted to go to an antique store. I of course accepted. We had a good time and it was nice. She called me later but I was in a movie. She called to update me on how her doctor's appointment went. I called back later and we chatted for a bit.
One source of confusion is that she keeps asking me about New Years Eve. She's asked me a couple times if I have plans and what I'm doing. I told her that I would like to do something with her if she was up for it. But she just says that she doesn't know what she wants to do and then mentions doing something with a couple different friends of hers. I don't expect that we'll end up together that night, but I would be open to it if she ever decides. We'll see though.
I don't know what my next move should be. I'm thinking that I might call her tomorrow or Friday to see how she's feeling. I would love to ask her to do something again, but I don't want to push her either. Maybe I should just sit tight and wait for her to come to me? Any thoughts?
Peace, B
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
I dont know all the details of your sitch but sitting tight & waiting is allways a safe bet,also my coach told me it can be a good idea to get a SMALL gift for someone when they dont feel well, its thoughtful without seeming needy. est of luck 2 you
why im here http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1247860&page=1#Post1247860 me 47 w 44 m 20 s 18 s 14 s 8 bomb dropped 10/8/07
Well I ended up calling her Friday to see how she was doing. She had a friend over so we didn't talk long. I did take a chance and asked her to hang out on Saturday. I had some things to return at the mall and I offered to take her to dinner. She said that she might be busy with a couple other things but that she would let me know later. She called back Saturday morning still not knowing what she wanted to do. Then she called me back an hour later wanting to go.
She asked if we could go to a few thrift stores too so we ended up spending quite a bit of time together. No complaints here. She felt bad that she didn't get me much for Christmas, so she bought me a sweater that I liked while we were at the mall. Dinner was good and we had fun hanging out. She told me several times that she had fun.
She came in for a few minutes when we got back to the house. She wanted to see the dogs. We both petted them for a while and the one dog who is really sensitive was acting a little weird towards her. She got upset because he was always her favorite. This started off a bit of a chain reaction. She said that she had been missing us a lot lately and I said that we missed her too. I told her that she is always welcome here. She seemed pretty down and was saying that she wasn't a good person. I assured her that I thought that she was and that I understood what she was going through. I told her that I loved her and got and ILY2 in return. She left soon afterward.
I was really happy at the way that the day had went. We spent over 6 hours together which is the most continuous time we've had yet. I was feeling great and dancing around with the dogs when she called about 10 minutes after she left. I answered with a "Hey" and the first thing that she said was "I Love You.". YEA!!! That was pretty much the only thing she was calling about. It's made the past couple days great. There's still a long road to travel but I feel like there is some progress.
We talked a little on and off yesterday. I asked her if I could stop by her place today (New Years Eve) on my way to my friends house. We agreed that I would give her a call first since neither one of us knew when we were doing things. We'll see how it goes.
I hope that this is a sign that 2008 is going to be a better year.
Me: 29 W: 28 T: 10 M: 7 No kids 2 Dogs and 1 Cat With Parents: 09/16/07 Apartment: 10/13/07 Back Home: ~2/16/2008
