Moving forward

[Starshyne]

I am here in Illinois, just a few miles northeast of St. Louis!

Sara

[karen43]

Me too!!! I was born in Oak Park, Illinois and lived in LaGrange, Illinois (my relatives still live in Elmhurst) & East Troy, Wisconsin (we had a motel there when I was 3 to 5yo!) until 3rd grade, so I think I grew up having a midwest childhood and still say certain words with the Midwest accent (like car for some reason). I loved growing up there and still miss it & the snow! (I was too young to have to shovel it of course!!!) Karen

[now_looking_for]

lodo

Hope this finds you doing well!!! So what have you planned for yourself for the weekend. I'm asking because no hiding allowed!!! I'm kidding but try to get out and get some fresh air, k.

[lodo]

Hey now-looking,

Thanks for checking in. This was a hard week for me and I pretty much have let myself slide, but feel a lot better today. Just knowing I have a place to live that I like makes a big difference!

The weather is absolutely beautiful out here, so I'm going to see if I can ride my bike to the coast - about 60 miles round trip. May not make it, but might as well try.

I think I'm past my major down - at least for awhile. Guess this is all part of the detaching process? Well, it sucks but I'll come out okay on the other side. I'm starting to realize, though, how glad I am that I'm dealing with my emotions and letting everything out. Ultimately I'll be a healthier person for it.

lodo

[WCW]

Hey, I've been in East Troy with my horse!
Whatchoo talking about a midwest accent? no accent here! it's everywhere else...

lodo, that's a heckuva bike ride! 60 miles? Good luck!
I went like .6 miles and had enough! I was on a dinky bike though and couldn't straiten my legs.

Glad your lips are starting to turn up again.

[karen43]

The weather is absolutely beautiful out here, so I'm going to see if I can ride my bike to the coast - about 60 miles round trip. May not make it, but might as well try.

I think I'm past my major down - at least for awhile. Guess this is all part of the detaching process? Well, it sucks but I'll come out okay on the other side. I'm starting to realize, though, how glad I am that I'm dealing with my emotions and letting everything out. Ultimately I'll be a healthier person for it.

lodo

60 miles? I go about 5 miles on my stationary bike in 30 minutes, so I think that would take me like 6 or 7 hours (if there are lots of hills!). I guess you might be in a lot better shape than me though!!!

Glad to hear you are doing well! I have my ups & downs, but I do think I have more up days as time goes on! And I agree it makes you healthier & stronger!

WCW-that is cool you were in East Troy--I love that town & still miss it! Everyone was so friendly!!! Everyone would always say hello to us, hopefully it is still like that; they don't do that in my town anymore!!!

Karen

[Lyn]

Hey Lodo and all, I feel so connected to all these posts. My H is being so cold too. He dropped the ILYBNILWY bomb on me in Feb 08, he said the OW is how he knew this for sure. But of course doesn't want to move out or lose his kids. So I'm supposed to just co-habitate. Some days just feel like the deep depths of h3ll. I want to work it out but he says he has not one ounce of feeling for me after 19 yrs. He wants the best for me & the kids BTW he thinks this will not affect them. So I feel your pain. Hang in there and congrats on your new place. I hope to move on someday, does that truly happen....

[lodo]

Hi Lyn,

Thanks for stopping by. What your H said to you is exactly what my W has said to me. ILYBNILWY, realized what she really wanted after being w/ OM & our 12 years doesn't mean anything, isn't attracted to me, doesn't feel anything when I touch her, thinks it would be easiest to D and then I can find someone to make me happy.

Anyway, we don't have kids so the D is pretty easy. Not emotionally, but legally. I'm just trying to take care of the things I can take care of and let the rest just happen. I have to feel good about the person I am, and that's happening slowly but surely.

I don't know how people move on - I guess I'm starting to out of necessity. Anyway, I'm glad you're here - it's a supportive place.

best, lodo

[gForce]

Thanks for your post on my thread. I think our emotional roller coasters are pretty similar. You might feel frustrated about W not moving her stuff out yet, but I can assure you -- walking through a half-empty house is not an improvement. My W just has a few things left in the basement, but otherwise made a pretty complete and definitive move. I don't think leaving stuff behind is so much cake-eating as just plain lack of motivation to get it done. And the assumption that you'll just suck it up and be her warehouse for as long as she wants. Anyway, thanks for the interest. I'll be following your sitch as well.

[GFI]

Hi there Lodo...

Many thanks for calling in! I am one jealous guy thinking of you being able to bike to the coast - that sounds like a great trip - I am picturing it even now! How it plays in my mind is a long drag up but followed by a long sweep down into a bay with sand and clear cool water!

Yes, you're right about the control thing...also heard a great one liner in a trail for a film this afternoon - have been to see Horton Hears a Who with S6 - and prior to film starting was a trailer for an up coming film - anyways can't remember title etc but it was about an adventure stories author and the line was: "be a hero in your own life" or similar. I guess thats what I and many are trying to be - to stop watching the world pass us by and to jump in there and grab it by the b*lls and stop being the person who lost out, who's numbers didn't come up, who gets to the lights to find that they've just turned red.

I'm not sure its actually doing an awful lot for future with my W - but on the other hand I know it can't do any harm! And it sure feels better than feeling like sh*t! And I really hope that you're finding it possible to adopt some of the same!

Hope your day was good fun!

Best - GFI