The weekend was OK, busy as usual. I think I need to make an effort to get a regular date night into the rotation. We spend so much time with the kids, that by the time they're in bed and we're alone, all we have the energy for is to fall asleep on our respective couches while watching tv. That can't be great for the R!
Positives: I was feeling awful yesterday and he was good to me, asking if I needed anything, etc.
He's a great dad and we had a nice time with the kids celebrating Father's Day.
He folded the laundry and put it away. Also, cooked breakfast and cleaned the kitchen on Father's day when I wasn't feeling well (both without me asking).
I haven't seen the alien in a long time. He is back to his old self.
Oh, almost forgot... today is my birthday! Yikes, I'm getting OLD!
Your getting old at 43???? Pleeeezzz! I am going to be 47 in a few months...getting ever closer to 50! It is all a frame of mind...right???
Your H sounds like he was very sweet taking care of things when you weren't feeling well. How considerate of him especially considering it was Father's Day...definately not the MLC selfish that so many of our spouses are famous for. Keep remembering these little things.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! and dang, you guys ARE old. hahaha, I'm totally kidding!!!! Your only as old as you feel
wow, your H did a lot for it being fathers day. that is nice! You'll have to make it up to him when you feel better.
Well, now you've learned again about how NOT to approach finances. So... sometime I think you guys need to talk about your communication. Perhaps ask him how he would LIKE for you to approach him or communicate and that you don't want to get mad about things, but when your not communicating with each other, you get frustrated and you want to change that. ???
Very glad H is himself again though. Hopefully as things progress, he will become a better him in time.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
haha, ya I know, I'm gonna get up there too! I'll be 34 this year. It'll be so weird reaching that 40 mark. It was weird hitting 30!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Thank you for all of the birthday wishes! Now that we're all old enough to have our own MLCs...
My birthday was nice. Lots of positives there. H made a real effort and although he did his usual running-around-at-the-last-minute routine, it didn't bother me. He brought me a big bunch of flowers, got a cake and some sweet gifts from he and the kids.
Not much is really new. Things are going OK this week. He still has some stuff at the condo, although he is never there. He said the landlord gave him to the end of July to move out, although he's only paid through mid-June. I will feel so much better when he is totally moved back, like I can put the S totally behind us.
I need to schedule another C session. I feel like we need to keep that going on a regular basis to stay on track.
New_attitude: Hey there I am also trying to piece our M back together with my H, and I have some ?'s for you.
We are also still living seperately, but my H only spends the night here with me about 3 times a week, and we hang out about 5 days a week with around 2 days completely to ourselves.
My H is showing no signs of wanting to move back in with me. I think he likes the freedom and not having to answer to anyone. He has even made the comment that some R's work best when the two people live apart.
He is telling me he loves me and is finally wearing his wedding band by choice again. He has taken me out to fancy restaurants, and has bought me a diamond "lifes journey" necklace, and finally apologized for all he has put me through. But other than those three things, he is still distant at times. He is an alcoholic now and often chooses the bars over being with me.
This piecing thing is really hard, and I was hoping that you could maybe stop by my thread and maybe give me some advise on piecing. Also, I was wondering how long you have been piecing for? Thanks, TIPPER
I will check out your thread as soon as I get a chance.
Originally Posted By: Tipper
My H is showing no signs of wanting to move back in with me. I think he likes the freedom and not having to answer to anyone. He has even made the comment that some R's work best when the two people live apart.
How did you respond to that? How do you feel about living apart? Can you be patient with it for a few months and then reevaluate?
Originally Posted By: Tipper
He is telling me he loves me and is finally wearing his wedding band by choice again. He has taken me out to fancy restaurants, and has bought me a diamond "lifes journey" necklace, and finally apologized for all he has put me through. But other than those three things, he is still distant at times. He is an alcoholic now and often chooses the bars over being with me.
Three definite positives for your H, but the alcoholism is a big negative. Does he acknowledge that drinking is a problem? Does he talk to you about it? My h is a gambling addict and he had to reach a very bad point before he realized that he was an addict, he started going to GA meetings and has been up and down ever since. I think he still struggles with it, but it's still so hard for me to understand the addiction. I know that it's his problem to deal with- I could never make him stop. He has to want to do it himself. That applies to any addiction.
Originally Posted By: Tipper
Also, I was wondering how long you have been piecing for?
Things with us started to get better in the fall. Around Christmas I felt a bit of a turn around and he started spending more time here, but still went back to his apt to sleep. In April he told me he'd like to move back in and he's been living here ever since. He's been slowly moving things back, but he's been here himself physically 100% since April.
Good luck to you. I'll be looking for your thread and will say hi over there too.
