Will you share pictures of the wedding on the alternate universe? What is your lil darling wearing?
Yes, I will. I always forget my camera. My sis will be there and takes lots of pictures. My sis has pictures of Funfest and I've ask her to send them hopefully she will soon and I'll put them up..She's wearing a little off white dress with white jeweled sandals..she's the flower girl..I hope she will do it. never know with a 2 yr old.
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Triggers bring you back to a place that's being rewritten during divorce drama. Good times were better, bad times were worse. Memories are precious but reality has an edge.
When triggers happen you have a choice. Shoot yourself in the foot and get stuck in them or get really busy. Both work, both do 'something'.. it's just easier to get stuck wallowing inadvertently when you shoot yourself.
Triggers don't do that to me. I mean I don't rewrite them. I just remember, most make me sad or melancholy for a few minutes. I stay real busy. Really busy. Lack of sleep busy. That's one of my problems, lack of sleep can put you on the coaster.
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Your son's wedding should be a source of joy, accomplishment. He's met someone he's pledging himself to in front of trusted friends and family. They are probably very conscious about what you're going through. They feel your hurt at the same time they're planning their lives. It's a tough balancing act.
I get triggers Mike, it's gonna happen. I think I get more lately since I've detached so it might be largely to do with where your at. Also, throw in you are doing wedding stuff, for your son from your previous marriage, I'm not surprised. Throw in your concerns for him and his bride, i'm not concerned there are lots lately.
Enjoy the wedding, I look forward to seeing some new photo's soon.
Triggers do such Mike, and your S wedding is a big one since your D is pending.
Remember that this is your son's and soon to be DIL big day. Enjoy the moment and your D all dressed up.
You gave you S the book, doubt he will read it. We were all young once and thought we new it all. Hopefully him and his new W do read it together and get something out of it.
Have fun, forget about the house it will still be there on Sunday.
I have been reading up on your threads. You seem a lot like me, can't really sugarcoat reality.
I also don't like the triggers. Had one yesterday at work and I was in a way wrong place for that to happen. Thankfully, most of the time I can put it out of my head when I am work.
It is easier said then done, but relax and enjoy the wedding. Find your happiness about your son and DIL new life.
Ages 16-26, another 10 years with one on my SD. She is a mess and is going to learn about life the hard way. She is one that it is going to take 2X4 a fews times to get through.
Take care.
A warrior does not give up on what he loves, he finds the love in what he does
By the way Mike, we will be expecting pictures, if not a video of you doing the funky chicken at the wedding. If it is going to be a trigger, then get your mind in the fun mode and break through it.
let's see, didn't those guys cruise weddings to pick up "hot" chicks???
I'll be good for a slow dance and there will some pictures..
No Videos..videos can be incriminating. I've got a good freind of mine on DVD dancing with his now Ex at our reception. He's a good guy, real good looking, women sort of flock to him. He's an extrovert by nature so he can talk chittt to more women than I ever thought about..anyway on this DVD you see him dancing..looks like he's having a seizure..it's pretty funny. he can't dance worth a flip but can sure talk up the women.
Last edited by M from Tennessee; 07/25/0812:23 PM.
LMAO - Talking to women is easy, you just gotta be confident and accept your gonna get blown out a lot, but if you can take that it's easy.
I never used to think it, but also a happy, clean cut many who is smiling and joking doesn't really need to do to much. I've been like that recently and the flirting i'm getting is unreal. I never used to think I had a chance but I'mso happy with the new me, it seems it's rubbing off.
Also Mike, remember the ladies love a Dad and especially a dad that is treating his daughter like a princess.....
Like most blokes I know, we are born with one basic dance and we just speed it up or slow it down as required.
Unless you have watched too much "Dancing with the Stars" then the danger really starts to creep in. Thinking you can do a lift and catching your partner unawares before landing in a heap is never a good look.
Dont get phased by the triggers we are all here to lean on.
Kenny
Me:40 WAW, MLC?:39 Kids:S11,S9 T:25, M:14 ILYB:Apr 08 W moved out Aug 08 W:Does not Want to Try
