Well, the guy is someone that I met right when I moved here. My mom introduced me to him and she has known him for a few years now...so he has got to be good right??. He got D about a year and a half ago, not his choice.
We hung out a little back when xh was still in TX and the D was still on. When xh decided to move here and work on things we stopped hanging out and talking to each other. I cut all contact because I didn't think I should ask xh not to talk to OW if I wasn't willing to cut contact with this friend...who had potential of becoming more than a friend.
He heard about the D from my mother and he started calling me again. He goes to the Wednesday night dinners but I had pretty much quit going while xh and I were reconciling.
Anyway he has become my running partner for the past two weeks or so. He is really nice, sociable, and has a great job....so a lot different than xh. Not that xh wasn't nice..but he was more of a "bad boy", and he never was sociable...I could never enjoy myself in a group of people because he hates being in groups, plus he never liked my friends so we never hung out with my friends...not even from the beginning.
I feel like I am in such a better mood after selling the house. I have been constantly worried about that thing since I moved.
That sounds really great. I say that if he makes you laugh, gets along well with your friends, and above all treats you well, you are very lucky to have met him. Besides, you don't have to look at it as if it has to be serious. At the least you could come out of this with a friend, and we all know we can always use another friend!
So yes, go and have a great time, and celebrate the selling of your house!
Nope, not looking at it as anything serious. He already is a good friend, so no awkwardness there, just glad I don't have to go to the wedding alone.
He knows everything that is going on and my emotional state right now so he is not pushing anything. Just nice to have someone to hang with....and to introduce me to people as I don't know a lot of people here anymore.
Bethie, I had grits Sunday morning and I thought of you
The title company just sent me an email that they are overnighting me a check since I overpayed . I will get it in the morning. That's good, because I am BROKE! Now maybe I can go put that deposit on the apartment. Hopefully they still have some.
When it rains it pours huh? It just seems to be getting better and better for you. You know it's so weird and yet not, how so many good things come out of our awful situations. Somedays I'm so amazed that I had to go through what I did, only to come out of it so blessed and happy. Your sitch is working out just as it should.
So you thought of me when you ate grits huh? Well thank you, I guess! You obviously remembered how much I LOVED them!
Well Bethie, there is so much pain involved it is hard to find the silver lining...but I am trying. My mom keeps telling me that things happen for a reason but I may not know that reason until a long time from now.
I have been reading about co-dependent relationships and I think that is what I had with xh. I enabled him (with money and also just taking care of him in general) and he depended on me and I liked it that way. Not sure why, I haven't had another R like that and I don't think I would seek something like that in the future.
I took a quiz and answered a big fat yes to all of the questions. I guess I need to try to look deeper into that so that I don't get into the same type of R the next time.
Kris, The whole co-dependant issue is interesting. When I first suppected xH of cheating on me, before I found this board, I was posting on a board for women who were having marital problems (no one was dealing with infidelity, so I went searching for a new board). But some of the ladies there said right off the bad that I was in a co-dependant marriage. I totally blew them off at the time. My H wasn't a drug addict or abuser or anything. How could I be co-dependant? But now looking back more and more, maybe they were right? I realize that there is a lot of issues that I have to work on in myself right now.
That was some good news about that check! Good luck in searching for an apartment. I was so happy to get out of my mom's house (but my mom was always there)
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Where did you take that quiz? I never thought my STBXH and I were...but I'm realizing that he might have brought it out in me since that seems to be his pattern.
(((Kris)))
Hope you had a great evening!
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
. I will get it in the morning. That's good, because I am BROKE! Now maybe I can go put that deposit on the apartment. Hopefully they still have some.
