I had a great weekend with the kids. Tonight I plan on getting my paperwork around to give to her lawyer. I also plan on making a few calls regarding my mortgage and a few other bills to see if there is anyway to get them lowered.
I am waiting on a call to get the house appraised. I really can't do much until that is out of the way.
I think I found out why my pre-trial date was pushed back, so she wouldn't have to attend. I guess it's basically where we meet with the judge to see where we are as far as our negotiating goes. My lawyer called this morning and said she is not going to attend. (Big shocker, avoid, run, do not deal with anything.) So I am not going either, he said there is no need for me to go now. He also said there will most likely be no need to go to trial either, which I don't want anyway. So it shouldn't be much longer now.
I am waiting for a response from her now. I have no plans of contacting her at all unless I absolutely have to. Life is much more enjoyable without all the insanity.
I'm sure there will be more drama, she isn't pleased unless she is sharing her misery.I am going to just keep my focus on me and my children. We will be just fine.
I plan on leaving the door open just a crack. I can't say for how long, I am closer. To what? I don't know, but I know it's better.
I forgot to mention that I did end up switching a day with her this week, and the kids will be staying with her mother overnight on a Friday. I am standing firm on the other days though. I am working hard on finding a balance. I do not want to do anything out of anger or spite, but I do want a happy life of my own without the manipulation, control, and misery that she feels the need to share.
I feel sorry for her and I continue to pray for her, Afterall she is the one that will have to live with her choices. Anyone who acts this way is truly unhappy with themselves.
The last time I spoke with my wife we ended up getting into a little bit of the R talk. It was brought up by her and I asked a few questions. This was over the phone this weekend. It didn't last too long, she said she didn't want to talk anymore. I respected that and let her go, at the end of the conversation I apologized and told her I had no choice then but to move forward with my life.
I received a phone call tonight from her. First she asked if my daughter was complaining of an ear ache. I said no, she acted fine with me. She said we need to keep an eye on her.
Then she asked if I wanted to sign her up for softball. I chuckled at first. It took me off guard and, well I have to admit it got to me a little. She asked what? I said, with everything going on right now, I don't know. I guess I'm a little leary of making a commitment. She said well I need to know because the sign up is going on right now.
The tone of my voice was not angry, but it was firm. I couldn't help it. I said well I find it odd that we are going to sit here and discuss this but we can't have a conversation about anything that is taking place right now.
I don't know what came over me, I told her exactly where I stand and the one reason I was telling her this. Again at the end of this conversation I pretty much let her go with what I said. I told her I was moving forward. I didn't do it in a mean way but I was confident and firm.
I don't know what came over me, this just set me off.
After she heard what I said, she said she was on her way home and asked if she could stop over and pick up the luggage so she could pack for her trip. (I was shocked, I couldn't believe she actually wanted to come by after what I just said.) Keep in mind she is not leaving until the 13th.(wtf) I told her no, not now I was leaving in a few minutes. I then received another call and told her I had to let her go. I said I would call her later.
Wow, I do know this had been building up for a while. Her call and what she asked just set me off, but I never raised my voice, it was just very firm.
Normally, she would avoid me like the plauge after that, and that fact she wanted to come over after what I said shocked me. She seemed upset that I told her no I have plans.
This had been building up for a while, I know this is a screw up, but what is done is done.
OK, why is it a screw up exactly? I get that maybe you neednt have said it three different times. And maybe it was a knee-jerk reaction to her discussing softball and probably not the time to say it. But it is how you feel, right?
And if you didnt want her to come over, then you shouldnt have her come over.
I think she wanted to come because that is what the aliens do. You pull back, they get off balanced and move in a little.
But now you have said it, and she has heard it. No need to say it again, ya know?
I see no need for you to call her later. Let her sit with the info.
Yeah it took me off guard. I'm trying to figure out where the hell I'm gonna live and she is calling up about softball for my four year old this summer LOL.
I'm not gonna call later, better to let her sit with all that. There wasn't any need for her to come get the luggage tonight. I don't even know if I want her to take it anyway.
I guess the only thing feel bad about is that regardless of what happens, life needs to go on with the kids.
I do need to talk with her about the softball thing. If my daughter wants to play, I will do whatever it takes to make it happen and make sure that she has fun.
Ok, so how about a quick email. W, about softball. It sounds great if d seems interested. Sign her up and let me know what I could do. Something short and upbeat. No mention of the conversations. What do you think?
That sounds like a good idea. She seems the more comfortable communicating that way anyway. I will do it tomorrow. If my daughter really wants play she should.
