Ugggg, dang car. I discovered that my tire had a bubble in it a couple of days ago. Who would have changed it for me before? Yep. H. I didn't ask him, he's too busy with his teenage OG. I just took it and got it changed. Old habits die hard. I'm glad yours was willing to help.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
When the Ml'ers withdraw, that is when they grow the most. Let him be, don't call him for things. He needs to come to you. I really feel that when we pull them back in our lives, it slows down their progress.
I know you miss him Cagz, I know you love him Cagz. I know how bad it hurts.
They have to hurt too in order to grow and come out of their tunnel.
I was thinking about something today. A long time ago, when my ex was just starting his crisis. He said that we would be friends forever. Funny how that did not happen. He said one day we would all vacation together again, him and OW and me and a new boy friend. No way would he ever be able to handle that!!! I was just thinking about how what they say never matches what actually happens. They are so messed up....
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
T--- today I wish I hadn't called...and I wont again. The car is a major issue-- but it is my life..not his. I will get it figured out. He of course said "i can't help you with the money...." yet he is going to Vegas (he doesn't know I know).
And ...mine said the SAME thing. "I wish I could buy the house next to you...we could be friends etc...vacations..yep all of it..." and today natta...
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
oh yes - and so confused. My x likes to come off like the good guy -- but true to form today when push came to shove he did nothing.... but i learned. I learned i AM more capable then I thought.
My confidence is still in the pooper...but I am learning to do things on my own. I think that part is hard too. We become a partenership and for me it was 20 years...I did what didn't come natural to him -- and the car thing--that was his business so it came easy to him.... NOW is the time for me to do and learn and grow.... SO NO MATTER what I can do on my own.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
You can do this Cagz. You are a strong good woman.
Don't be hard on yourself though. This all does not come natural.
It does get easier though.
Each time you think about calling him and don't - this then starts to become habit.
This then will empower you.
He will feel this, and sense this.
He will become curious.
Puzzled. -
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
i was talking to somene about my car...she said "well isn't he in the car business still?? i said.... ah we are divorced..it was final in july..he left me 2 years ago...." she was like ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oooooooooo..
Its the first time in a long long time that people who knew us once together didn't know..... it was wierd.. and I KNOW I didn't handle it right... I was pretty hmm blunt.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
stupid stuff.... this weekend is the anniversary of ow moving in and slipping in bed with x (d12 called late ..sad..) it led to drama...
this weekend is the anniversary of the first time x actually said the words "i want a divorce..."
x has since "broke-up" with ow -affectionately known as bimbo..and has moved on to woman #4 (there were a couple in between the break up).
#4 - has 5 kids of her own. they broke up for a 2 week period but is back which causes jealousy with me --- hard to explain but its the truth
today was x's birthday
x's mom and husband were in town for a very short in and out..anyway met them for coffee...they were nice but it of course causes a bit of saddness.
x doesn't love me - and i know it
i dont believe that even God loves me... the ONLY time in my life I EVER truly felt loved was with x... and then now here I am... and he says he never did... LONG drawn out story -- but I am working through this one too.
so see - just lots and lots of ugh.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
