Ok. I've been on long enough and the sun is shining. I am going to buy a new rod & reel combo, select some new tackle and hit the lake. Here fishy, fishy, fishy. So far, unemployment isn't so bad. And you should see my tan. : )
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
Never made it to the lake, but I did get a new pole and a bunch of new tackle. Came home and filled the reel with line, put on a jig, organized the tackle box and am ready for tomorrow. Supposed to be a beautiful day.
I would have gone to the lake but it was nearly dark by the time I came home because I mowed the front yard before I left. With 2 acres to keep mowed I wanted to get a jump on it and not have to use up my weekend getting it done. A little mower therapy is always good. : )
Tomorrow I have some housecleaning to do and then I'm off. My H is coming over after work to replace a bit of siding that came off the house and figure out where the birds have made a nest in our eave vents.
H asked me to pick up the movie Mall Cop to watch after because he figured we could both use some comedy. Boy, that is an understatement after yesterday.
Night all.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
You are a strong lady! Nice job of standing strong during that difficult conversation. You were honest and open, but not weak. Hope you have a good visit with H tmrw and can enjoy some laughs during the movie to ease some of the tension.
The fact that you are communicating and spending quality time with your H is admirable! So many of us here have such a long and hard road to travel in hopes of eventually ariving at the "best friends" stage again with our WAS. But you and H have made it to that stage, and it's obvious your H still loves you. Your patience, faith, and strength is an inspiration to me!
Me 40 WAH 43 T 4 years M 9 1/2 months stepson 9 H left 5/17/09
ndsmhelp, so sorry for the hit and run. My hunch is that you will not let this latest upset be a deal breaker. Wanted you to have the chance to make that decision before I put it out there. Haven't been back to the BB since the day I posted that. Been busy and GAL, as well as spending some time with H and saving the baby birds.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
You are a strong lady! Nice job of standing strong during that difficult conversation. You were honest and open, but not weak. Hope you have a good visit with H tmrw and can enjoy some laughs during the movie to ease some of the tension.
Take care!
Dreams, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Believe me, when I started on the DB route I was a marshmallow. Now, not so much.
We did have a good visit. I have always loved how my H can laugh right out loud when he watches a funny movie.
Not only did he replace the siding, he also saved the baby birds. It was a neat experience we shared to take the birds out of the vent and put them in a new "nest."
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
The fact that you are communicating and spending quality time with your H is admirable! So many of us here have such a long and hard road to travel in hopes of eventually ariving at the "best friends" stage again with our WAS. But you and H have made it to that stage, and it's obvious your H still loves you. Your patience, faith, and strength is an inspiration to me!
Me 40 WAH 43 T 4 years M 9 1/2 months stepson 9 H left 5/17/09
Montana,
I think we are at this stage because I have relied so much on my faith and have never really gotten angry. Not that I haven't had angry moments through this, but I have acknowledged and taken to heart my part in our sitch. Every day I pray that God will change me in a way pleasing to him and to my H.
I know exactly where you are at, with H just leaving last month. You are shocked, devastated and scared. Take heart. Db, pray and definitely realize that GAL is so very important.
When my H dropped the bomb, and then when he left, I wanted to change anything and everything about me to make him happy. I've learned that I need to be who I am, but change those things that have hurt him. Namely, I was so "busy" that he felt last. And honestly, I did take him for granted.
I will never make that mistake again, regardless of how our sitch ends up. We are not out of the woodwork by any means, but I have made my choice to be his wife forever. When he is here I am loving and focused on him. When we spend time together I stay in the moment and listen more than I talk.
Keep the faith.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
Just an update and then I have to hit the bed. The weekend was pretty busy.
I spent the day with my Mom and sister going to yard sales. I was lucky enough to find a queen size bed for my son's old room, a bench for my front hallway and a glider rocker for my library.
Friday afternoon when I went out to check on the baby birds, I discovered 2 of the 4 on the ground. We'd put them in a basket, which I guess wasn't deep enough. I called my H to let him know because I had to go to pick up the new lenses for my glasses.
He came by to check on them. He found one in the nest had passed away and the fourth baby was unaccounted for. He placed the two into a bucket, again suspended under the eaves. Mama found them and was taking care of them.
That night I checked on them after dark. I could hear them making noise so I knew they were ok. On my way back to the house I heard a loud squeak. I shined my flashlight over there and it was the lost baby.
I brought him inside and tried to warm him up. I held him against me and covered him with an old shirt. A call to a wildlife rehabilitator confirmed I was doing the right thing. Then she told me to put him in a cloth in a cardboard box on top of a heating pad. When he warmed up she told me to give him worms.
He made it through the night and my H came in the morning to add him to the bucket with the others. It was pretty cool to feed the baby. I had to stuff the worms right down his little throat. I left to go to an auction before H arrived.
At the auction I was lucky and found a lawn tractor. Called and left a voice mail for H to let him know. My FIL was with me at the auction and hauled it home for me. I was surprised to find H had hung out to see the tractor.
H and FIL discovered the mower was burning oil, but otherwise looked good. Then found the mower deck wasn't sitting correctly. The two of them spent about 1 11/2 hours to get it fixed. Neither had planned to spend the time so by the time they finished H was a little stressed.
When he left he was a little grumpy. I was very grateful to both of them. Gave FIL a big hug before he left and told H to have a great motorcycle ride.
That afternoon H called and asked me to meet him at the state park so we could go riding. Met up with him and we rode for about 4 hours. We would ride for a while and then stop and look over the gorge. It was so beautiful. I tried as much as possible to stay in the moment. (Still so hard, because he is so sexy!)
After the ride I said thanks, have a great night. He asked if I wanted to grab a bite to eat. I said I could check and see if they had wet burritos yet at the place we like to go to. (They only make them in the summer.) It turned out they did. I followed him in my car.
We enjoyed the wet burritos. They were so huge neither one of us could finish them. I said next time we should just order one and share it. We didn't even have room for ice cream after and we usually get ice cream every time we eat there. Both of us were yawning like crazy. All that fresh air, plus my checking on the bird all night, and we were both pretty beat.
The next day (Sunday) I went fishing with my girlfriend at 6 am. It was so gorgeous with the wildlife, the scenery, and the beautiful weather. Four sets of geese and goslings were just heading out for a morning swim. The fish were biting and it was just great.
While I was fishing I had a text from my H letting me know he might want to go to see Star Trek again. I said ok, let me know. It wasn't until around 2, but he asked me to check at the theater what time it was playing.
Turned out it was at 3. So we met up. Movie was just as great as the first time. We are pretty sure we even figured out the scene with the cameo by Randy Pausch. We hadn't figured it out the first time we saw it. I ate way more popcorn than he did, but I hadn't had lunch knowing we were getting popcorn at the movie.
After the movie we went and had coffee and a snack at Tim Horton's. He talked about the movie, the ride at Letchworth, stuff at work. Honestly, I enjoy listening. I've learned to ask a question and then let him talk. He knows when we are together that he is my focus.
Before he left he said I will call you some time to do dinner. I said ok, see you then.
On my way home I stopped at Wal-Mart. I bought paint for my son's old room. The week will consist of studying for my civil service exam and painting my son's old room.
My son came out with his new girlfriend Tori on Tuesday for dinner. It was a nice visit. I spent all day today washing the walls, prepping the walls (they were like pin cushions from all my son's posters that he'd had) and getting the trim covered with blue tape.
Ok. It is now 11:50 and I am hitting the hay. I have to get some sleep so I can paint tomorrow. I want to get the room ready before Thursday. The mattress and box spring is coming Thursday and I won't be able to move the bed once it is here.
Night all!
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
