Going straight forward...antlers 5th thread.

[antlers]

Kiddos are still on vacation with their mom. I've had so much free time since they've been gone (except when I'm working)...it's been a long time since I've had time to myself like this! I've been riding the bicycle...a lot! Did 64 miles today. Also working in the flower beds and in the house. Spending time with friends too! I'm actually enjoying it...but I do miss the kids, and I can't wait to see them.

[K4D]

Antlers,

You have come a very long way since the first time we spoke. I am really proud of you. You are truly getting a life and staying fit and taking charge of things. You are finding ways to stay involved without pursuing your W and taking the advice on this sight very well.

And your attitude is so much more upbeat now. Of course you have down moments. That is natural. We all do. But you are on a great track to success.

Good job on it all. Next time you are going to be in the Dallas area, let me know and we can get together for dinner or something.

Kevin

[antlers]

Thanks for the attaboy's Kevin. I'm still working hard at it. You hang in there...you can do it too!

Kiddos are on their way back today. I can't wait to see them...it'll probably be too late tonight, and I have to work this weekend. So, it'll be Monday most likely. Left the house at 0700 this morning and took a 40 mile bicycle ride. I feel pretty darn good. Got back and mowed the yard and did the weedeating. Now, I'm gonna have a Michelob Ultra.


ps - I'm good with having dinner if I'm in Dallas.

[antlers]

I need some help.

Wife and kids have been on vacation for a week, and they are on their way home.

I just got this text from wife, out of the clear blue...

"Whether you realize it or not (oldest daughter) has some issues going on which stem from her upbringing. I blame you for the shitty way you treated her growing up and I blame myself for not getting me and the kids out of the shithole they grew up in any sooner."


Can you folks please help me respond to this in an appropriate way? I want to validate, and lead...as Coach would say. I would really appreciate some help!

[Coach]

"Whether you realize it or not (oldest daughter) has some issues going on which stem from her upbringing. I blame you for the shitty way you treated her growing up and I blame myself for not getting me and the kids out of the shithole they grew up in any sooner."

"Ok, I understand your concern. I don't want to get into a blame game because that won't solve the problem. I do want to know what you feel is going on with D and how can I help mend things?"

[antlers]

Thanks Coach! I sent it, word for word, since I thought it was perfect. Please stay tuned. Thank you.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Perfect, Coach!

[antlers]

Thanks Coach! I sent it, word for word, since I thought it was perfect. Please stay tuned. Thank you.

Still no response from the text above that I sent to her. This type of communication, on my part, is so different from the way I used to communicate with her. I don't take the bait, I don't fight, and I don't argue. I listen and validate, and I try to be truly compassionate.

These type of texts that she sends to me occasionally...they do hurt. But I put forth a lot of effort to have the right kind of attitude, and usually wind up shedding them like water off a duck's back. And I appreciate the feedback, advice, and example responses that you folks help me out with. Thank You!

[antlers]

BTW...I've ridden my bicycle 346 miles in the last 8 days! Medicine for the body, mind, and spirit. I feel good and strong. If I could get my cognitive functioning in the shape that I have my body in...I'd be out of control!

I'm workin' on it!

[orangedog]

Yes!!!!!