Give it to me straight!

[john210]

Don't worry, I am no dummy. The niceness either means he is thrilled I am going to the atty so he can be free and let me do the work.....or it means he has already started his own devious plans so is not worried about mine.
Or as strange as this might sound, it may mean absolutelly nothing. When we are still hanging on to the rope, we try to interpret every single communication. As we get better and let go, we care less and less about the whys and why nots. And we put on weight....someone told me that i put on weight...last night.....I took that as a compliment.
SO BBJ, you are doing very well...just try to avoid him a little mor eif you can.
I know you are seeing a lawyer on monday. That must be very difficult for you. i sense it in your fairness with Dan. I think you need to losse that. Tell yourself that you are not going to take advantage of the situation. You did not initiate it. Now that it is clear that this is the path he chose, YOU NEED to PROTECT YOURSELF. You need to fight for what is legally yours! Not a penny more and not one less. It is time for business and business is not always nice.

[BobbiJo]

You are correct John. I am going to take care of me and the kids. I am not looking to be punitive, I am looking to be just.

Happy Anniversary to Me....today makes 12 years.

Gotta go get ready for church.

And your right maybe his niceness means nothing except he was being nice for the evening. It is just surprising after the vitriol from the other night....but I will take nice any day.

[Kalni]

Anniversary? Ouch! Sorry Bbj,
K

[ernest88]

Someone needs to save him from himself and I KNOW FIL will not tolerate him screwing me over after what he has already done to me.

From experience I can tell you this....when battle lines are drawn..you will have no allies from Dan's side....

family is family.....they will support each other to the end..right or wrong..just as your will support you..

[ernest88]

Well, give ol' Mikey the prize again.

Today I had a visit from Nice Dan.

I told you....dan is predictable....

he's nice dan because he thinks you're blowing smoke up his ass...her thinks you don't have the balls to go file, he thinks you won't do it, thinks you're bluffing..

once he's served....then you can welcome back "bad Dan"...especailly when the L comes after his money, farm, assets....

and one more thing....I can see why you told him...but I would hold my cards close to my chest from here on out...

[mishka422]

and one more thing....I can see why you told him...but I would hold my cards close to my chest from here on out...

I agree. He doesn't need to hear from you any longer about what you are doing or when. Let the L's handle every bit of communication between you from now on. Kid talk only and even then, extremely limited. Try to limit your conversations with Dan about logistics for the kids, nothing more.

[LolaL]

I thought I would have an ally in stbx's mother and stateside surrogate mother.

stbx's mother's philosphy is that he can do anything he wants, as long as he is happy.

The surrogate mom did rip him a new a-hole,but also promptly cut me out of her life about six months later with no explanation.

Stick to your family and friends. Ultimately his may not agree with is actions, but they are still HIS family.

[mishka422]

I hate to say it, but Mike and Chris are totally right. My xh's family is still cordial toward me, they agree that he is crazy and stupid, but blood still wins out in the end.

[ernest88]

I hate to say it, but Mike and Chris are totally right. My xh's family is still cordial toward me, they agree that he is crazy and stupid, but blood still wins out in the end.

I loved my ex-FIL like my own daddy...I went to My ex-FIL for advice at times on certain things before i went to my dad.....

when I told my ex-FIL that Kim had bombed me....(for some strange reason she could not tell her own parents ahead of time)...the first thing he said...."I'm sorry, I love you, I hope you two can work things out but understand Kim is my daughter and i will support her....blood is thicker than water"

and with that...the games began...

and to this day we have not talked...and numerous gauntlets have been thrown down...

[NNP1965]

This scares the beegeebees out of me because H's oldest brother and his wife have been my rocks through all of this and H's sister and I have become MUCH closer through this. I have very little family of my own. I will really be lost if I lose them.