Kalni--I've never posted to you before, and how funny that when I do it's on the topic of head lice!!! I'm a school nurse, and sadly that makes me a bit of an expert on the subject.
Yes, the chemicals can be toxic, but they're definitely where I'd start if I were you. Be sure you get something permethrin or pyrethrin based (unless they have really serious plant allergies). Follow the directions. The next day/evening, coat their hair with fabric softener, cover with a shower cap, leave on for ~30-45 minutes, and rinse out--that should unglue the nits. Comb thru with a nit comb. Meanwhile...vacuum their bedrooms very thoroughly, as well as any upholstered furniture. Wash everything that has come in contact with their hair--hats, jackets, bedclothes, backpacks--in hot water and dry in the dryer. Bag up all the stuffed animals they've had contact with in trash bags for 2 weeks--don't need to throw them away, but that will cover the life span of any lice on them and then they can make a triumphant return after 14 days. Honestly, if you're diligent about all this, it should be quite effective. If they return--and they do tend to make the rounds at school--olive oil is a good method for repeat infestations--let them sleep overnight if possible with olive oil on their hair, comb thru with a nit comb, and wash out. Don't use baby oil or petroleum jelly--it's less effective and much harder to wash out. And--heaven forbid--with each infestation, you have to do the cleaning/vacuuming/laundering/bagging up process again.
I am not so effective at DB'ing, it seems, but head lice I can handle.
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012
Well, my hibernation has ended as I'm finally getting my sanity back after taking on that project that damn near killed me...
Anyway, it took me a tremendous amount of time to catch up on the 20+ pages I was behind, but I've got to say, WOW. Things are surely interesting in your world.
stbx is FINALLY coming around, but I'm not sure if it is in time or not. Again, as all the others have said, it will always be completely up to you as you know him and the situation best.
However, like you, I'd like to see more ACTION from the man and less words. He can say all he wants, but that doesn't replace him showing you he loves you, needs you, wants you, is attracted to you, etc. He needs to step up, and maybe as Bill said, move a mountain or two.
I think lodo told you to "file and continue forward" and that isn't such a bad idea. You have to wait a year, correct? Well, if you file, then stbx has a year to SHOW you he's committed to repairing and rebuilding your M, your trust, and your love.
If he can't do it in that amount of time, then he never will.
Just a thought. I'm glad I'm back and up to date w/my favorite DB Bond girl.
RTL
PS - The lice thing SUCKS!!! Just use that wash and comb the nits out like crazy. D had lice and it is simply awful!
Trust? I dont know lodo. Cheater once always a cheater? I dont believe that.
I don't either. But I do believe once a cheater always prone to cheat again unless those inclinations are dealt with. Why? Read on:
Quote:
I have never cheated on anyone of my partners, but I could sure see how it happens and when/if I would feel attracted to someone's personality (that always does it for me), I could feel the tension and quickly retreat so that the other person would not get the wrong idea.
Exactly. And so it is with those of us who have never cheated. When most people feel the inclination, they don't follow through because they recognize the danger. For others, it doesn't matter so much. And until it does matter, they probably won't be very good at maintaining LTRs.
Trust.
I'm pouring you a nice glass of Malbec to help you deal with the lice. You can always shave their heads.
Well, I did the therapy with medicin and comb for a couple of hours last night. They all came out dead and I tried to comb out the eggs. Luckily my D who has long straight hair had only 2 lice on her and something like 10 eggs that I saw. My son was so much worse!!! 10 lice and hunderds of baby lice and eggs... And his hair was freshly cut on Sat really really short!!!
Anyway, changed the pilow cases (didnt change sheets, will do the house today), did myself a therapy although it seems I dont have any, and I'll do the house thing today. No stuff animals in my house or rugs (not yet-Thank GOD!!!) but 2 little ones I have, will vacuum, spray, etc...
Thanks hoosiermama, I appreciate your advice, will do the softener thing tonight...
Regarding H : I have no doubt he is not fooling me. I have no doubt he feels free now, as if a weight lifted off his shoulders, I can tell from the sound of his voice. I have no doubts he feels ashamed and embarassed (he said he is a poor example of a man), I have no doubt that he does have strong feelings for me. I have no doubt this whole "story" seems strange even to him now. Hindsight? His affair didnt come out as he thought he would? Dont know.
Sunny said a great leap of faith would be required. That's what I felt last night. He kept saying he cant expect me to believe he will be different, he only wants me to believe he could be different. He said, "you have made, rightly so, a pic of me and you think I will always be like this, but that is no true, I wasnt always like this and I will not be like this again." OK, sounded better in Greek... He wants an opening and he said he will show me he will not be passive, or "light", he will have patience, show strength, lead us away from this crisis. He said he wants a different life for us.
So, the words are there. And it is funny how we now talk about her with her name, as if she is a friend and he is willing to share details everytime I ask. The woman that never existed... K
Work sucks BIG time!!! I need change in my life. In all areas. I am expecting some material today from abroad and I am ready to make some jewelery.
I'm surprised I'm saying this, but all that about H sounds good. Maybe you should give him the chance he asks for.
When my son had the lice, I took him for a buzz cut after the shampoo. He really liked it. It was my hair and my daughter's that was hard to deal with. I had to go to a good friend to have my scalp checked all the time. Just the thought of lice made me itch! I kept my daughter's hair in tight braids for a long time after that.
I was told that when you have your hair colored, lice dont get on you. I hope it is true!!! I did make a therapy last night but I am itching everytime I think about it... My babysitter/housekeeper will clean the house tonight, their room and beds etc...
Lotus, you suprise me saying that. Ali send me a message from Santorini to give him a chance... I will wait a couple of years before I make up my mind... K
My D has thick blonde hair down to her waist.. hard to see the things
I ended up cutting the eggs our of single pieces of hair. It was the quickest way. I spent hours and hours seperating and combing. Good Luck.. color doesn't stop lice from attaching, but having product in your hair, like gel or mousse or hair spray help.... they can't stick on to that.
On the H front..... sit back and let him do the work.... if it interst you so be it.... if not so be it.....
M:47 M:18 D16, S19 1st S 1/08-5/08 Reconciled/May 7, 2008 Left again Nov 9, 2009 I Filed: Nov 17, 2009 Final: April 14, 2010 EX walked away from kids too
