Home from SF. Sigh. I wish it was longer. It was cold, windy and foggy the entire four days and I loved every minute. I am determined to move back, even though it means I will have to give up my big beautiful house and yard for a small rundown apartment.
I waaaaaay overspent but got some fabulous things. Remembered that I have a couple weddings in June so at least I can say that I bought the outfit for something. I'm sure BF will be biting his tongue re: my spending, but perhaps if I just show him the shoes (and nothing else ) he'll be more open. Thanks for the idea H4U!
I met hhh for lunch on Friday and we had a nice chat. I will say that I was a bit envious of being able to start over fresh in a new city. I know, most people would kill to be piecing now but I still think about having a single life. I know there are lots of negatives to it also, but they're hard to see when you're just enjoying being in a place you love.
I got home and drove straight to BF's office. His entire dept has been working late and through the weekends since the beginning of the year. I knew I wouldn't have any time with him unless I popped in for a quick visit. He came home really late and crawled into bed to cuddle. This morning he told me that he really missed me when I was gone. I felt bad that I didn't really miss him because I was too busy having fun.
So I guess I'm just in a funk now. Need to clean up the kitchen and unpack. Tomorrow morning I start the job hunt.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
Seems to me what you are feeling makes a lot of sense. When we have been through what we've been through, you have to face the reality of single life, what it might mean etc. And, let's face it, there would be some positives...
I think it is also a sign that you managed to find some healthy detachment through your sitch that you can go on a trip on your own, GAL, and not have anxiety about what BF is up to at home, etc.
Is there any way you and BF can move to SF together?
Well, there was a bit of anxiety about BF while I was gone. The first night he told me the server at work was being shut down at 9 so he could only work until then. I called him after 10 at the house and no answer. I immediately wondered where he was and what was going on. I waited another hour and called again, this time he was there. I started in on him saying I thought I could trust him while I was gone and at the first opportunity he wasn't where he said he would be. He told me they didn't shut the server down for another hour so he just stayed at work until that happened and came straight home. He asked if I wanted him to call me from work before he left then from home when he got there. No, I decided that was just too much plus I didn't want him to be calling and just leaving messages since I planned on being out late for the rest of the trip. So I let it go. Just had to remind myself that whatever was going to happen would happen and I would deal with it then, no good in worrying.
Yes, BF has said that he is willing to move to SF. But I have to get a good enough job to support both of us so I can be working while he is looking for a new job. His company doesn't do any business in the Bay Area so transferring is not an option for him.
Not off to a good start. Worked out this morning and have been stuck on the computer ever since. Time to get offline and get busy!
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
Meh, nothing going on here. I'm having a hard time getting motivated to do anything these days. BF is very understanding, too much I think. If I were him I'd be pissed if I came home to nothing being done in the house all day every day. I've always had this motivation problem and still looking for the answers.
That said, I'd better get off my butt and go meet my friend for lunch. At least that's something!
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
Hi Pearl. I find a good way to do stuff around the house is to set a stop watch for 15 minutes. Go do stuff then when it beeps finish off what your doing. Make sure you got music blaring away and listen to stupid fun mindless songs...
Do this every day... Then one day a week reward yourself for 15 minutes with the stopwatch.
And always make your bed when you get out of it.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
) he'll be more open. Thanks for the idea H4U!