Should I Tell Her to Move On???

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Thanks W

I don't want to give up, but maybe instead of suggestioning she moves on I tell her " I understand if you need to move on"

This might be better because I am validating ger feelings and not pressuring her.

I made an appt for next week. She know I talk to a MC. I did goto an IC but she wasn't good so I stopped. Right now I just speak to a DB coach trhough phone sessions.

[newmama]

"I understand if you feel you need to move on but I do not want to lose you! Here is what I am doing to solve my issues so I can be a terrific husbnd and father."

[The Wifey]

How about you don't tell her either one. That isn't giving up, dear. Sometimes the best thing to do sometimes is NOTHING.

I have to be going, so I won't be able to respond right away. I'm at a library and heading home.

Get the appointment before you say anything to her.

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Thanks gals.
I like that statement better newmama.
The waiting is the hardest part.

[Number 8]

I think it's a great thing that you're getting help for yourself. Anxiety and depression can destroy a relationship, and it will speak volumes to her that you're doing something to take care of YOU. Please keep us posted on your healing process.

[dburt]

One thing I learned in my journey is words do not meen anything to the WAW, only actions do. I would do the therapy or see your family physician (my preference) and get treatment for the anxiety that you cannot handle for yourself. She will notice the changes and wonder what has happened to you. You will appear more confident and more appealing. Being a man means taking care of business, and with you treating your anxiety is taking care of business. Taking care of business is very attractive to a woman.

Changes are for you, the waste product on the backend of the equation just might be your wife taking a second look at you, regardless you will be better off for the future.

Burt

[The Wifey]

Burt, you are so RIGHT! You can say as many words as you want and it won't have the impact that actions will. Don't tell me, show me!

The pain is the hardest part in the early days. I know. Sometimes you just have to let yourself cry it out. Once you cry until you can't cry any more you get a little break. Its nothing to be ashamed of. The secret is you don't let HER know. Around her you are calmer and cooler.

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Dburt

I know there is nothing I could say to change her feelings.
I learned that awhile ago.
But, should I not say anything to her about my anxiety?

Looking back it really has caused much of our problems in the M.

I want her to know what my problem is but I don't want her to her a pity party for me.

I do want her to accept the fact that my actions were not done to hurt her in any way.
It was behavior I didn't know was affecting our R.
I made an Appt with an IC for next week to discuss my issue.
Can IC perscribe medication?
Or should I go to my Generel family doctor?

[Number 8]

You may have to see a medical doctor or (don't be afraid of this word) a psychiatrist. I take medication for ADD and anxiety, and I see a psychiatrist. However, my psychiatrist does NOT do any counseling or therapy. In other words, you may have to see more than one person to get all the help you need.

[The Wifey]

If you really feel you have to say something then do. Just don't have any expectations for any particular reaction. No expectations, no disappointments.