And the answer is YES!! I purposely went 1.5 hours late to avoid dinner. Damn if she didn't expect that and it wasn't ready when I got there.
I brought some more of her stuff from my house to put back at her house. She started crying after dinner and started saying that she was stupid and that she loves me; doesn't want to let me go. She just said all that stuff to keep from hurting me.
I just told her that this was all confusing; grabbed my boy and came home.
I'm wondering if I should even be in Surviving...maybe I'll move to separated. cause it don't look like it's moving anywhere fast. I'd love to D; but I really can't afford it and with her waffling like this, who knows how she'll be in settlement talks.
effin' battchitt
Last edited by marriedCrazy; 03/02/1012:42 AM. Reason: my grammar looks like I came from GA....wait a minute, I am from GA!!
I'm moving this back to Infidelity...Obviously, I moved here prematurely. She showed up at my house about 30 minutes after I got here; D5 in tow. Said she was hysterical after I left and needed some closure after I left. I feel like a freakin' rubber band!!!
Anyway; I'll make an update in Infidelity...follow me there..
apologies to those who are REALLY surviving the Big D for barging in...
Wife decided that she couldn't be transparent; or better yet, wouldn't be transparent. So she wants to proceed with the D. Frankly, I'm tired of the yo-yo life anyway. I never thought she could do it and she can't. It's so ironic that she told our MC that the reason she has been fighting from filing is that she's afraid that she'll lose her "best friend." I'm sorry; but I have a hard time with that one.
So I have her proposal and I'm going to come back with one of my own. We are planning on doing the settlement and filing uncontested; so we'll see how that goes. We don't have any assets; I had to get rid of those supporting her lifestyle and keeping our M together over the years. We've already divided up the marital property over a year ago.
MC- you are doing the right choice. You gave her every opportunity. She is very foolish.
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
Yes I have given her more than enough opportunities; but only because of the children. If it were just me and her; we would've been over 4 years ago.
Andabelle...actually mommy had the baby nearly 4 months ago. The kids (S9 and D6) are young enough that they really don't know how awful this sitch is. They understand that I'm not dad and have dealt with it wonderfully. I just wonder how they'll react later as they grow up. Will my boy think I waited to long to D? I certainly don't want either one of them to grow up thinking that this is how you let a wife treat a husband. So I struggled with showing how a man tries to keep his family together as God intended. But we cannot will a person to stay in a M. So, instead, I hope to instill upon the kids that you need two people with the same values.
They also need to learn NOT to start out in a relationship as my W and I did. It was not healthy to begin with and I was too smitten to trust all the red flags that were waving in the beginning. DAM disease!!
Right now I'm reviewing her family law worksheet. REALLY...she gave it to me!!
I think I could get out of this pretty well and that would help me keep the resentments down; thereby allowing me to continue in a friendly co-parenting relationship. It helps too when the WAS is waiting to be free to pursue another R.
Just a thought that I had last night after divorce care...It seems that I can be really friendly with the W over the phone. We can have great convos ON the phone. But when I'm in the presence of her; I get withdrawn and somewhat bitter.
Saw her on Wed. and she looked like crap; even with makeup...
MC, Does your W have a hard time looking you in the eyes when she speaks?
I notice this when talking face to face with mine.
I think it my be guilt or shamefulness.
Either way, they need to get help for themslves.
BTW, I am updating my sitch. stop by. Thanks gr8
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Saw her on Wed. and she looked like crap; even with makeup...
I had the same experience with my W. I told a mutual friend about it and noticed she started to take care of herself.
I even complimented her last weekend when she dropped the kids off. She said thanks but her voice was somber.
I don't know about you but I feel pretty good about myself now that I have made changes. (For Me).
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
