Do a little digging and find out who OM's wife is. If you know his name, public records may well reveal her name and other info.
In the meantime, tell your W that next weekend doesn't work for you, maybe sometime the following week.(you are out having fun on the weekend, of course). This will buy you a bit of time to try to contact OM's wife and find out what OM has been telling her. If OM is lying to his W, then you have a chance to expose the affair.
Until you see what else you can find out, say NOTHING to your W about what you know and how you know it.
Do a little digging and find out who OM's wife is. If you know his name, public records may well reveal her name and other info.
In the meantime, tell your W that next weekend doesn't work for you, maybe sometime the following week.(you are out having fun on the weekend, of course). This will buy you a bit of time to try to contact OM's wife and find out what OM has been telling her. If OM is lying to his W, then you have a chance to expose the affair.
Until you see what else you can find out, say NOTHING to your W about what you know and how you know it.
Solid. Greek
Me45 H46 T25 M22 S21 & 19 D13 Separated and filed 8/08 Moved home 11/08
I'd like you to keep in mind one thing: The soft, compassionate approach does not work very well with WalkAway Wives in the midst of an affair. You're going to have to suppress those wishy-washy melty-man tendencies within you.
I'll try keep up to date with your thread.
Thanks this is very very helpful, man. Could you pls elaborate on that last parragraph? What am I supposed to do now?
Now I have a very very immediate issue to resolve and i;m not in good shape to resolve it.
We had agreed to meet in one week! should I cancel it? Should I take this other guys advice to reclaim the apartment? I can't afford to pay two rents :S !!!!
Another proof of the affair is she gave me the digital camera before I came back from holiday and there are pictures of them having dinner! Not doint anything but that's enough of a proof to me that they went out more than a few times. Can I confront her with this?
Pls do ela
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
Who pays for her cell phone and Internet? If it's you, cut her off. She's been using the Internet to conduct her EA. Her mobile is probably not clean either. If that's a bill you pay, turn it off. Greek
Me45 H46 T25 M22 S21 & 19 D13 Separated and filed 8/08 Moved home 11/08
Now I have a very very immediate issue to resolve and i;m not in good shape to resolve it.
That's correct you are not in good shape. A man does not REACT... he responds... WHEN HE IS READY.
Is your issue really that important to you? Nope! Is complying to her demands going to help you? Nope! Has meekly obeying her every whim helped you so far? Nope!
Stop doing what DOES NOT work.
You cut off ALL contact with her. She does not call the shots anymore. You do. You will talk to her when YOU feel like it.
Originally Posted By: Fracesc
We had agreed to meet in one week! should I cancel it?
Nope. Don't cancel it. Just don't answer the phone. Don't confirm anything. Let her worry about you for a change. Turn the tide. She wants to dump you right? Well you don't let her!
Originally Posted By: Fracesc
Should I take this other guys advice to reclaim the apartment?
Not at this moment. You are not ready for that just yet. You need the time away from her right now more than you need the money and the aggravation from her presence.
You DO NOT confront her with the affair YET. You only get one chance at that. Confrontation and exposure if done incorrectly will work AGAINST you.
I can't tell you how grateful I am for your advice, Gnosis.
I will do that.
I also found this Guy details, he is married with kids. 13 years has been married and he's feeling 'guilty' to leave the marriage for the kids. Doing my best to find out her home phone number or who the wife might be.
Any ideas?
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
question about going, dark. What if she finds out I've being hiding and tries to look for me at work to drop the bomb there?
She's just starting a new job and she's actually really busy. Her commute is hell so chances are she won't do that. But it's good to know how to react.
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
I can't tell you how grateful I am for your advice, Gnosis.
Gnosis is awesome. He's helped me a lot.
Quote:
I also found this Guy details, he is married with kids. 13 years has been married and he's feeling 'guilty' to leave the marriage for the kids. Doing my best to find out her home phone number or who the wife might be.
Any ideas?
Do you have his first and last name? Do you know where he lives? Where he works?
