Ladies, you three are some of the Sweetest Sweeties in Sugar-town!
OK, Smiles - Now you're f*ckin' w/my image. I'm trying to be kickas$.
A day of silence and peace, huh? GOOD!
I'm coming out by you next month for work. If I wasn't triple scheduled, I'd make you take me for a run and some of those fancy pancakes? LOL You are a great dad!
Last edited by mindfull; 04/17/1012:26 PM.
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Whatisis, just go to Meetup.com and enter where you live and it'll search for Meetup groups in your area or you can even start one.
I live in a smaller metropolitan market -- about 500,000 people -- so the number of Meetup.com groups available to me is pretty small. I found one singles group and it was a Christian singles group and everyone appears to be older than I am. I also found a Dining Out group with about 90 members. Problem there, if it's a problem, is that I do have my girls a lot, work out of town a bunch in the summer and have put myself on a budget to limit the number of times I spend money at restaurants.
Still, the Dining Out group looks like it's scheduling weekly $5 Club movie and dining nights on Fridays. If I run into an empty Friday then I'll try it.
Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11 http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz http://tiny.cc/thread2 http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu http://tinyurl.com/thread4 http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6 http://tinyurl.com/thread6
Guess I sort of understand why STBXMRSSP has been so loopy lately. Apparently they're laying off at work, cutting salaries for those that remain, and STBX has discovered the not-wisdom of having rushed out and bought her own place last summer -- it's hard to carry two Coastal State mortgages.
So now, my lawyer has been advised by her lawyer that, no matter what else happens, the house has to go on the market now, like tomorrow, because STBX has spent every penny she has and now is paycheck-to-paycheck.
Well, as far as I'm concerned, all bets are off. I see no reason to commit to staying in Coastal State. There's no way in h*ll I can afford a place here on my meager academician's payroll. Of course, the custody thing is problematic -- I hate the idea of the old-fashioned 9 months with mom, 3 months with Dad, but I sure do like the idea of pulling up stakes and homesteading back in Big Midwestern City.
F*ck me, this just keeps getting better and better.
If the time comes, I can help! That is where I be, kind of. Oh, and from the sounds of your academic focus, I'm from a diff study.... But, my academicians know your academicians from around town. Just yell!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Isn't there something about the date of separation which pertains to the marital assets at that time?
Why should the marital home have to be sold because the divorcing spouse made a poor financial decision. Why not her current abode? After all, where would the kids be? Is it like a guy telling a judge.. "Well, uh, I bought the boat of my dreams to express my renewed sense of freedom (exclusive of the marital slice funds) and now I can't afford it so sell the house and I'll keep the boat?
And wouldn't the custody be more like SP 70% and her 30%?
Right now I just don't have answers. Characteristically, this all came up on a weekend. Also characteristically, the only reason it came up at all was that I'd happened to check in with the lawyers and they'd just got the document but were half-way out the door. Every time she's done that -- had the document "provided" between 16.30 and 17.00 on a Friday. Keeeeee-rist.
The more I think about it, the more frustrated I get, but instead of letting that frustration morph into lashing-out-anger at STBX I'm using it to fuel a solution. This is one of those situations where @Coach keeps talking about leading. Well, f*ck it, fine then. I'll lead. She can keep making messes, and I'll keep finding ways out of them for Themselves and Smiley's Person Himself. I always admired Patton. I'm not interested in holding my ground. I am advancing constantly.
I'm glad you're taking the Patton route with this, because I can certainly see where the frustation could morph into anger pretty quickly.
I know going back to Big Midwestern City is sounding pretty good to you about now, I just can't picture you leaving Themselves while you do it. I also can't picture STBX jumping at the chance to be a full-time single mother.
I don't have enough knowledge of the legal side of STBX keeping her new purchase, while you would have to sell the family home to keep it all right-side-up. Gypsy may be on to something though, it may be her condo that goes.
Nice of her to keep the messes coming to keep you at attention at all times!
@SP"...using it to fuel a solution."
There's this great coastal city down south that I know about. Really friendly people, actually not as expensive as one might think, and some really good schools. (Since everyone is throwing you their pitch:)
