MF, just catching up, have been going non-stop since yesterday.
Photographer was great. Turns out her H had and EA, maybe PA, too. Small world! That part's not so good but we had fun during the shoot. Will post pics when I get them in about a week.
Sorry your H is being a total ass. You're right, it seems to be the theme. It would have been so much easier for them to say, "Look, I'm unhappy and things have to change or I'm out." But wait, that would require them to (wo)man up and that also seems to be the common thread, they're all cowards.
Not to worry. You are in charge of the sitch and you know what you want and how to get it. It's going to get tough but we all know you can handle it. And we're here to help you any way we can.
Last edited by pearlharbr; 05/02/1005:23 AM.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
Pearl - The path gets a bit blurred, but we're on it. How was photo shoot?!?!?!?!
EXCERPT from an email to a friend...
I woke up very sad. Very, very sad.
I'll tell you why... I know the first thing S10 is going to ask me this morning is where his Daddy is. Just typing this is hard. What do I tell him? I've ALWAYS covered for H. (He's working, honey... He'll be back soon.) But, he's NOT working. And, they know he left... well... mad (yesterday).
If I cover, it's just more of the same... and sooner or later it will have to be dealt with. If I don't cover, it's the first crack in their innocence. That's hard to take, on your own... Also, H left yesterday, and I carried on, was happy (in front of them), etc... So, do they see it as okay for Dad to do this stuff?
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
I wish I could help with the kids thing, but I'll leave that to the other parents. I know you want to protect them for as long as possible but remember that this isn't your choice, it's H's choice. And because it's his choice he is also choosing the consequences. Don't take them all on yourself.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
You may have to consider getting someone professional to talk to the kids and for them to talk to if necessary. When you talk to them I think that you can be honest that you feel upset too. Hopefully they can still have a good relationship with Mr. Mind and hopefully he will step up to the plate as a father in whatever the new dynamic is.
You will go through a range of emotions, I'm sure. Make sure that you take time to feel them all and work them out of your system. It will take time. It is not an easy thing to deal with.
You are a strong person but sometimes strength deserts us and even strong people want someone to lean on. This is the time to use your suppport group. And then there's us !
Here's the true beauty of Mindfull (if I do say so myself)... I'm a QUICK RECOVERY!!!
The boys (and D18) and I have been busy today... EVERYONE is thrilled w/my plans for the day!!! Are you ready...?
NINE loads of laundry - washed, dried, folded, AND... PUT AWAY!!! KITCHEN CLEAN - Including complete re-stock of all Gatorades, Powerades, Red Bulls, Coke Zero's, Waters, White and Purple Grape Juice, etc... Lunch Made! - All Beef Hot Dogs on the indoor grill! Oh, AND tater tots... How do you not love that? Grocery List Made! - Good Lord! When's the last time I shopped anyhow? Grocery SHOPPING Done! - ICK! HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT!!! $275 at WALMART for crying out loud! I didn't even buy meat! (Never get meat there, BLECH!) Furniture Organization - carpets cleaned last week... Everything was still "up" PAPERWORK sorted - My desk is prone to PILES. Ugh!
Oh, and about 100+ emails sent (for work), 100+ names entered into our CRM, and a LONG conversation w/my boss this am.
Not sure what we can do tonight? They're all staying scarce! I was considering windows. Yes, windows would be good.
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
!