Ok, It's confirmed. Going there to collect my things on Saturday. It feels liberating but I know I need to be prepared for whatever she's got there waiting for me. i.e. shouting, having OM there with her, remarks of the BF or even complete indifference (which at this point I'd appreciate) , etc
I'm thinking it's best to send the note to her parents AFTER I move my stuff out.
About the joint account she said she'll let me know later.
Relief.
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
Ok, It's confirmed. Going there to collect my things on Saturday. It feels liberating but I know I need to be prepared for whatever she's got there waiting for me. i.e. shouting, having OM there with her, remarks of the BF or even complete indifference (which at this point I'd appreciate) , etc
I'm thinking it's best to send the note to her parents AFTER I move my stuff out.
About the joint account she said she'll let me know later.
Relief.
You know if you clear out all of the funds in the joint bank account, you can usually close it by yourself, the bank usually doesn't require both people to be there to close the account. Just an FYI, call them and verify and then you'll know and that's another thing you can take care of by yourself.
Ok, It's confirmed. Going there to collect my things on Saturday. It feels liberating but I know I need to be prepared for whatever she's got there waiting for me. i.e. shouting, having OM there with her, remarks of the BF or even complete indifference (which at this point I'd appreciate) , etc
I'm thinking it's best to send the note to her parents AFTER I move my stuff out.
About the joint account she said she'll let me know later.
Relief.
If you think there might be an issue or things might get heated, bring a friend for support, someone just to stand around and maybe help with carrying boxes and stuff, having some support while you're doing this isn't a bad thing.
This account is special, even if it's in 0.00, it has an automatic interest free overdraft of more than 1000 dlls. That's why I need to cancel it. And yes, I tried to do that on my own but they need both of us.
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
I agree. Definitely bring a friend as a witness and also have a tape recorder in your pocket. These interactions are critical later on... A friend of mine even had a another friend video tape him taking stuff so she couldn't accuse him of stealing later.
No friends available this weekend sadly. I'll be fine. I'll have the driver with me. I don't think she'll make a scene. She's most likely to be passive aggressive or have flowers or photos of OM in the apartment already (if not the bastard himself).
Last edited by FormelyknownasF; 05/12/1010:39 PM.
Separated: March 1 * Affair discovered: 20-March * Exposed: 27 March * Def. separation: May 1st *
If you think there might be an issue or things might get heated, bring a friend for support, someone just to stand around and maybe help with carrying boxes and stuff, having some support while you're doing this isn't a bad thing.
This is solid advice. You'll have a witness and everyone should be on thier best behavior. Plus you'll have backup! Go in, get it and get out.
If not, be the man...be the adult but dont short yourself. Take what you feel you deserve.
Last edited by Sgfan; 05/13/1001:25 AM.
Formerly SGfan M:38 W:33 M:8 yrs T:10 yrs Bomb: Dec '08 Separated: 4/18/09 Divorce: 8/28/09 XW Affair began: April 08
