Our H have no idea how they hurt us. They have no empathy or forethought or consideration for us whilst on their journey. It's just how it is but doean't make their behaviour any easier to witness.
My H turned up at home in OW car because his had broken down and couldn't understand why I asked him never to do it again as it was like bringing her in the house. He was truely shocked and what he had done.
True is absolutely right - he knew what he was doing. But I have to ask: why are you doing his personal expenses? Isn't now the right time to stop doing things for him? I mean, really? If he wants to leave you, then let him leave you completely. Not just part way. From a guy's perspective, isn't it nice to have somebody you can abuse and she'll still do your laundry while you screw another woman AND you don't have to pay anything in terms of money or other? For that matter, that could be a woman's perspective as well.... Anyhow, I suggest you close that avenue off. He wants to be independent? Ok, be independent and stop expecting you to do things for him. Personal expenses are just that - personal. Handle it big guy! Mila is not her to be your slave or to work for you. That's not a mean thing, that's just business Mila. Take care of it and don't let it take care of you. Besides, you need more free time to work on Mila and daughter. They both need your attention desperately.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
I think you did wonderful at the meeting. Just perfect. If you going dark has caused him to lose his mind, then giving in at all would be counter productive.
Mine also started running but only did it one day. LOL. Probably had something to do with OW having run a marathon or something just prior to them hooking up.
And seriously, he gave you those receipts, is he INSANE? Yes, I know MLC Is insanity personified. But girl, I feel for you. Holy cow, I think I would go over there and slap him not once but twice. Either as mentioned he totally didn’t even think of it, or else he’s trying to get to you… maybe even subconsciously. Now you have to decide. Will you let him get to you?
LOL, trying too hard to impress... I was thinking the same thing.
And Jack, I love the strikes, great post. I also hate the f-ing soul mate thing. Wasn't it you that said soul f-buddies on my thread? That was hysterical.
Thank you Lotus, Glam, SA, CW, TG, Libby, AJ, MH, Golfgirl, Jack, Mach
I must admit, yet again he got to me, I was pretty upset last night, not much sleep....not so much because what they bought and did, but by the callousness and lack of concern for my feelings by giving me those receipts.
Lotus - I'm thinking this through...I will say something, just have to come up with the best way to approach this.
Glam - that T-shirt would sure look good on my H right now
CW- "b-turd" and "fktard" my new pet names for my sweetie. Who was it that came up with b-turd? Was that you CW? I know Jack gets credit for the second one....I think I'll busy myself with coming up with more, probably more fun then trying to make sense of this mess.
TG - Interesting that couple of you guys think that he is trying to get back at me...for what? for being "dark"?...do you really think that he is that devious? I'm more inclined to believe that it just "doesn't compute" and that he has no clue why I should be upset about it...
If he is trying to get back at me for being "dark" what is he going to gain? Me reacting to it and setting new boundaries? Like asking him to pay cash from now so I don't have to see his private expenditures?
BTW - the expenses that I've listed were paid from our personal joint account, he did buy some small "business expense" stuff through business but I didn't write about those.
Eye of the storm - safe place - I like it...but I still have to run wherever the storm goes so I keep my "safe" position
Libby - you know how this feels
AJ - you also think that he did in on purpose...interesting to get guy's perspective. I'm doing our business and personal accounting. We still have everything joint, and to be honest I don't want to start demanding that we separate our finances, if that request comes from him, I will have to deal with it...What I can suggest to him is to ask him to give me his monthly budget and I will give him a cheque and he can manage it, that way I won't see what he does with it. But it's hard, we are running two households right now money just flows out like crazy and business is still struggling....
M&H - If I had looked at those receipts right when he gave them to me...I don't know what I would do...scald him with my Starbucks? LOL
Jack - LOL "Chucky Cheese" somehow I have a hard time picturing my H there with his "date". My H is bit of a snob...he likes good food, good wines...and he is definitely trying to impress her with his worldliness...but really what hurts beside him being with her is the way how he rubs it in my face...why?
And if anyone mentions the word "soul-mates" again I will spit at my screen !!!!!
Mach - you made me laugh - what, don't you like romantic comedies? I wonder why they picked this one...needed reassurance from Hollywood that "true love" cannot be broken by time and circumstances?
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
