Just an update. Had a wonderful weekend w/family. Had a great day at work today. Had long lunch with High School buddies. Came home and did some mowing. Got some good advice from a friend about contacting the Veterans Administration Service Officer for this area about my sitch. Funny, I'm not really missing WH all that much anymore. There was a time I was so lonely I wanted to die. Now? Not so much.
Tomorrow is another day, and I'm actually looking forward to it!
JTB, Do I take that to mean that within the next 48 hours I will again be in the depths of despair. Just another dip on the old roller coaster ride?
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
Over him? Nope, probably love him the rest of my life. Able to go on and be a happy individual? Yep. The person he is at this time is not the person I was ever in love with. Don't expecthim to ever be able to admit to his PTSD and alcoholism, but there is always hopeI have my kids, my grandkids, my family, my friends, and right now, that's enough. I thank God every day for them. Anger? Yes, at the pain he has caused my kids and grands. My grandson just lost his father's father today. So with WH out of the picture, by WH's choice, that leaves him with no Papa. Hurt me? I can take it. Hurt my babies, I'll cut your throat. As for me, the best revenge is living well.
So much for my happy bubble. WH just called me wanting me to talk about a settlement and not involving the lawyers. I told him that I had an appt. with the Veterans Service Office for this area on Friday. He went from somewhat threatening to conjoling, trying to tell me one minute that I could not receive any of his Military Disability to saying that that was great, he gets hurt for his country and I get his money. I kept my voice even. Told him that I was exploring all my options and would talk to him when the time came. Kept saying we could make a deal. Finally said good-bye and hung up. I'm not the jittering mess I was the last time we talked, just hurt by his attitude.
I really don't know what to think. Is he trying to BS me or what? Offered me his college benefits if I'd settle now. I kept asking him what the great hurry was, and he would never answer.
Did my best to stay light. Kind of at a loss as to what the whole phone call was about. Any suggestions?
Your H is still out there twisting in the wind. Who knows what any of it meant, least of all him.
He may be pushing because ow is pushing him. It also may be because the faster he can settle with you the faster he can get rid of his guilt. It could be both, or neither or something else entirely going on in his head. No use trying to figure it out cause it'll probably be something different tomorrow.
Get your happy bubble back. It helps pass the time.
Keep to your plan of seeing what is what on Friday.
Trying to figure out why a person does what they do is hard enough when the person is sane...trying to figure out why an MLCer does what they do is like tring to catch fish with a smoke ring.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Yes, I think it's a bit of both. One, OW is pressuring, and two, he's worried about what I'll possible get. Twisting in the wind is a nice mental picture. By the throat. He did ask if I was dating anyone. I told him 'No, I'm married'.
