Do you do all the cooking for her or something? There are times she sounds like a little kid and that if you don't prepare something for her to eat, she'll starve to death.
Does she ever cook for you?
No I don't do all the cooking for her and she does prepare her own meals if I don't do it first. We had this conversation many threads ago. It is a 180 for me that I plan on doing. I am usually up throughout the night due to my work schedule and since I am up I make her some quick breakfast and pack her lunch. On the nights I do have work she does it herself.
Originally Posted By: Sakaro
OIN, I hate to sound so down when you are dealing with so much right now. You need to check the bathroom garbage for femine products. I'm afraid your wife is late and is afraid she is pregnant already.
The first time W and I ML after 7mo of no intimacy she was just ending her cycle. We won't know if W is late until another 2 weeks.
Originally Posted By: Dane
DISCLAIMER- Ok, don't take this the wrong way and I am probably completely wrong. No disrespect intended.
But is it possible that the wife is pregnant by OM, and now hurriedly trying to get OIN to "appear" to be the father due to timing?
I know it is a terrible thought, but stranger things have happened.
After our sitch I would never discard anything but I will this. W has had her regular cycles since the start of our sitch. I was with her nearly every time she purchased her feminine products and always seen the wrappers in the thrash during that time.
M: 27, W: 25 Together since: 01/31/00 M: 10/4/09 (8 Months) ILBNILWY: 01/24/10 EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted). Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10 Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
While I am not an expert on OIN's wife, I have followed the saga for a long time now. Those who have joined recently may not be aware that she had an EA with someone at work and when he and his wife became aware that she was emotionally involved, the OM ended it. There has never been any evidence that her relationship with OM was physical.
Thing have been getting a lot better for us. W has started to initiate contact ex: grabbing my hand and holding it, giving me a hug and kiss as she leaves for work or returns home from work. W seems to be slowly opening up to me and all around she appears to be happier. Dare I say even more happy than she had been in several years ( and we just begun to reconcile).
I find validating and letting W be herself helps a lot (causes less conflict). Any near arguments we had are ended quickly with validation or simply realizing that it is not worth picking a fight and nothing good could come out of it.
W explained to me that she wants to raise a "big happy healthy family" with me. W said that her dream was always for us to have children while we were young and I get a sense that she may feel as if we lost out on time due to our sitch.
W is slowly coming around and opening up more and more with each new day. At times I found it beneficial to just not beat around the bush and express things to W and as a result we were better off after....W is very hesitant to full open up in fear that I will hurt her again (something she has said often).
M: 27, W: 25 Together since: 01/31/00 M: 10/4/09 (8 Months) ILBNILWY: 01/24/10 EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted). Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10 Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
Sorry for not keeping everyone up-to-date. I am sure it would be in my benefit to continue to post but the forum started to consume me so I took a break.
We have been moving along in the right direction. My W and I have got along very well and at the very least we have maintained a very civil relationship.
We did have a rocky day which let to a slight argument due to conflict of interest. We were able to resolve the disagreement and move on from it.
W and I continue to talk about starting a family. W now understands my point of view on the matter and knows it will not be 'right away' and accepts that.
We are now officially registered for Retrouvaille. W actually made out the check and mailed in the envelope.
W has been initiating a lot of contact (hugs, kisses, holding hands)
Some highlights during the past week: - W and I sit on the back porch, and W grabs my hand. Our dog walks over and licks our hands and W says "See, she just gave us her approval, even she knows it was meant to be"
- W and I were at W's family gathering. W was talking to FIL just before W took FIL new car for a test drive. FIL said to W "Just watch out for cops" and W replied "Where is mine?" (meaning cop, referring to me).
- While ML W says "ILY so much"
- W has been randomly saying ILY
We have the funds for our trip in Oct. and have pretty much paid for the whole trip. W is very excited and so am I. I have a couple surprises I am planning for W.
At the moment it is hard to recall and narrate our interactions in the past week but I will try to be more consistent in my updates.
I sometimes think about how bad our sitch once was. The terrible things W would say that convinced me that there was absolutely no hope for our R/M and now we lay in bed every night holding one another. I am not the best at applying method preached on the forum and in DB books but I followed along enough to get to this point and I am happy I never gave up when all seemed hopeless.
M: 27, W: 25 Together since: 01/31/00 M: 10/4/09 (8 Months) ILBNILWY: 01/24/10 EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted). Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10 Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
