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DanF #2058029 08/17/10 04:59 PM
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It just adds some finality to the sitch.

I have to get under control before I go home. I'm letting my mind wander. Our 4 kids.

God


Me-43
W-36
TS-10
D-7
S-4
M-11
Rings off-8/16/2010

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Originally Posted By: PMA_Baby!
Dont focus on the negatives and what you could be losing.

Instead focus on what a STRONG and CONFIDENT WARRIOR you are becoming for YOU and YOUR CHILDREN. A MAN that YOUR FAMILY will be PROUD of.

Keep your chin up and keep fighting for your family. Stop giving your WAS so much POWER and CONTROL. Cut the puppet strings. She is not capable of making rational decision while under this chemically induced spell. So dont give her so much credit.

Capiche


I like this a lot.

I have given her the power for too long.

Thanks so much.

I wish I didn't need this place so much but I sure do today.

Thanks.


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Rings off-8/16/2010

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You're welcome. Yes you have and knowing is have the battle so all you have to do is CHOOSE to CHANGE it.

You will not be DEFINED by the PAST but by the FUTURE.

The rings dont mean squat if the commitment is not there. They are symbols of a strong and loving marriage. She doesn't deserve to where it now anyway. Someday she might deserve it, but not today.

Get that book and Man up!! Your kids are counting on you to save your family. Whether it's with your WAW or not.

PMA

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Quote:
The rings dont mean squat if the commitment is not there. They are symbols of a strong and loving marriage. She doesn't deserve to where it now anyway. Someday she might deserve it, but not today.



I know you're right. I think that is what's bothering me so much today, the fact that she took hers off. She said it was because she had been cleaning house. I know it means nothing if the commitment isn't there. It really hurts, that's all. I know, poor IDU got his feelings hurt, get over it. I will. My kids need me and I need to be stronger.

The school board Pres. called me at work today and said he wanted to meet and talk. We talked for a minute at my church picnic a couple of weeks ago and he said he would call. It will be interesting to hear what he has to say. Odd timing. I really hope it's something that will help my position in the coming months.


Me-43
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TS-10
D-7
S-4
M-11
Rings off-8/16/2010

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You've passed through the next door in the emotional evolution of the LBS - barreling forward in doing what is right and not stopping. So don't be too worried about the queasy feeling; every time we take a step forward it is going to feel a bit scary. You will adjust and soon feel confident and serene again, especially if you continue to pray.

God won't screw you over. Know that. He is just as upset over the state of your R as you are. Hand your wife over to Him. If she decides to wake up, so be it. But don't expect it - some people just aren't willing to accept the grace that God offers.

You've taken a big step, and soon you will feel prepared for whatever way your situation falls. That's pretty much where I am now. I really don't want to get divorced, but I will face that challenge if it comes to that, and plow forward with God leading the way.


WAW Using God
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pigskin #2058212 08/17/10 08:37 PM
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Originally Posted By: pigskin
You've passed through the next door in the emotional evolution of the LBS - barreling forward in doing what is right and not stopping. So don't be too worried about the queasy feeling; every time we take a step forward it is going to feel a bit scary. You will adjust and soon feel confident and serene again, especially if you continue to pray.

God won't screw you over. Know that. He is just as upset over the state of your R as you are. Hand your wife over to Him. If she decides to wake up, so be it. But don't expect it - some people just aren't willing to accept the grace that God offers.

You've taken a big step, and soon you will feel prepared for whatever way your situation falls. That's pretty much where I am now. I really don't want to get divorced, but I will face that challenge if it comes to that, and plow forward with God leading the way.


It's really good to here from you, Pigskin.

I pray often. I really try to turn it all over to God. I'm afraid I just don't know how. It is dropping the rope. Realizing I have no control over her. I want God to give me what I want; my M back better than it was before. I know God doesn't work that way. 'Thy will be done, not my will.' I know God won't screw me over.

I start thinking I am prepared and I have done things that I have been told to do. I then start second guessing myself and wonder if I have pushed her away for good. I know that what works is what is the hardest to do. I admit, I haven't really done anything that has worked so far. This feels so bad. I guess that means it will work the best. wink

I am at a loss today. Thanks for checking in.


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As a wise forum member has in their sig, it's not about doing what feels right, it's about doing what works.

pinhead #2058221 08/17/10 08:51 PM
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Originally Posted By: pinhead
As a wise forum member has in their sig, it's not about doing what feels right, it's about doing what works.


God bless Sandi!!

If I would have listened to her sooner, I may be in a better place right now. Maybe not, but I would have saved myself a lot of time and heartache along the way.


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I want to thank everyone for helping today. If you couldn't tell, I am pretty down right now. Back to feeling like I am running out of time, or actually out of it. I have been here long enough to know that is not neccessarilly true. Even if it is, I tried.

I'm feeling a little better now. I will feel better tomorrow and the day after that. I will love my kids with all my heart and soul. I will be the parent they can look up to and always be there for them.

Back to doing what works and doesn't feel right.


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Rings off-8/16/2010

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Originally Posted By: PMA_Baby!
Keep your chin up and keep fighting for your family. Stop giving your WAS so much POWER and CONTROL. Cut the puppet strings. She is not capable of making rational decision while under this chemically induced spell. So dont give her so much credit.


Well put. She doesn't define you. You do!


Me 36; H 40
baby born in May
M:13, T:15
Bomb (OW): Dec 09
began DBing: Feb
WH overseas with OW
old: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2027369#Post2027369
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