W and I just completed our Retrouvaille weekend and what a tremendous POSITIVE it was! For the first time since our sitch began my W began to open up to me.
My W said it was the first time in many years where she spoke to me and felt "understood" and "heard."
This weekend has really helped my W see our marriage in a new perspective and she feels more optimistic about our future together.
There were a few times where my W did cry in the privacy of our room after holding back her tears during the presentation. My W said she could relate so much to what a presenter was saying. She honestly thought she was going crazy because no one understood how she felt but it was a sense of relief for her to hear someone else shared the same feelings.
My W seems more excited, has been playful and "loveable" toward me since our Retrouvaille this weekend.
We both gained a level of understanding of each others hurt and lack of trust toward one another and what we need to do to rebuild that trust.
We are not fully reconciled but we are heading down the right path. W even TM FIL to tell him about our weekend to save our marriage. FIL replied with "I'm proud of you guys."
M: 27, W: 25 Together since: 01/31/00 M: 10/4/09 (8 Months) ILBNILWY: 01/24/10 EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted). Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10 Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
Going into Retrouvallie I did not know what to expect or if it would even have any positive impact on my W and her views on our marriage.
We learned the steps to take so we could rebuild trust and learn to forgiveness.
The weekend was very informative and after attending, I highly recommend Retrouvaille to any couple considering divorce or separation or those couples who maybe r=trying to reconcile but don't know where to start.
M: 27, W: 25 Together since: 01/31/00 M: 10/4/09 (8 Months) ILBNILWY: 01/24/10 EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted). Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10 Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
Happy to hear you had a good weekend! I am so glad that she opened up to you. It always warms my heart when people come home with positive results. Now stick with the program and do the homework and go to the post sessions. The weekend is just the start of the process.
First of all, I'm very sorry for this revelation and for your pain right now. I have no advice on how to process that, so I won't try, but....
Are you and W attending the Retrouvaille follow up sessions? I think the program will continue to be a HUGE resource for you, if you will use it to it's fullest.
Were any of your presenter couples overcoming infidelity or sex addictions, etc? I know two of mine were. Call on those people for support. It is what they are there for. You will BOTH need in-person guidance to move through this next phase of your R and the healing and forgiveness necessary to move forward in the M.
Don't try to go it alone right now. Lean on your local Retrouvaille sponsors and let them support you with prayer, friendship and guidance.
