I just keep praying that whatever the Lord's will is, I will follow it. Just hard to know what that is right now. As for my location, JB, I'm in the Lone Star State!
lc4 - just know that others on this board are praying for you as well. Thanks for the geographical reference. It's always a curiousity thing of mine. I have Southern family roots in GA & AL.
Thanks for your kind words, lc4. My son and daughter (who is also awesome beyond description) and my faith have carried me through this mess to this point.
You've been doing this dance for 3 years? You're a better (wo)man than I, Gunga Din. It's been only 5 months for me, but if you hop over to my thread, you'll see I'm at the "thinking about letting go" stage.
You deserve better. We all deserve better.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
You guys are the best. Thanks for your support. Ya'll must have been high school cheerleaders back in the day, with all the cheering up you do. ; )
Thank God for the blessing of our AWESOME kids, big and small! They are living proof that our marriage unions, no matter how stressful they may be, were MEANT to be. When I am ready to throw in the towel and write H off as a total lapse of judgment on my part, all I have to do is think of my kiddos and know, yep...he was supposed to be a part of this crazy plan called life.
My night has been interesting. H came to pick up my 2 youngest ones after he got off work...so tough for me. That used to be the time of day I looked forward to the most...crazy, loud houseful of kiddos, me cooking dinner and having a glass of wine and my handsome husband walking through the door to the delight of us all. Now, it's him darting in looking totally uncomfortable, the kids scrambling to get their things, me holding back tears...not fun stuff.
But as soon as he left tonight, he sent me a text telling me how great I looked and that my hair looked nice. Now Tom Cruise may have had Renee Zellweger at "hello," but all you gotta do with me is compliment my hair on the day I've had it done and I'm all yours! Not to mention, he hasn't complimented me on much in 3 years. So that was nice and made me smile. He's been texting all evening, heavily flirting, but I'm putting up some boundaries with that. A little 180'ing on lc4 (or Gunga Din)'s part. I've always made things too easy for him.
Hope you guys rest well. Thanks again for the support. I appreciate you more than you know.
Ya'll must have been high school cheerleaders back in the day, with all the cheering up you do. ; )
LOL That couldn't be further from the truth for me. I think I just had it deep inside me and I'm drawing it out now. It's gotta be a God thing, an awakening deep inside.
Originally Posted By: libchick4
My night has been interesting. H came to pick up my 2 youngest ones after he got off work...so tough for me. That used to be the time of day I looked forward to the most...crazy, loud houseful of kiddos, me cooking dinner and having a glass of wine and my handsome husband walking through the door to the delight of us all. Now, it's him darting in looking totally uncomfortable, the kids scrambling to get their things, me holding back tears...not fun stuff.
This is very hard, I know it. It may be what you have to go through to get to a better place.
Originally Posted By: libchick4
But as soon as he left tonight, he sent me a text telling me how great I looked and that my hair looked nice. Now Tom Cruise may have had Renee Zellweger at "hello," but all you gotta do with me is compliment my hair on the day I've had it done and I'm all yours! Not to mention, he hasn't complimented me on much in 3 years. So that was nice and made me smile. He's been texting all evening, heavily flirting, but I'm putting up some boundaries with that. A little 180'ing on lc4 (or Gunga Din)'s part. I've always made things too easy for him.
Sounds like you handled it well. You took the positives from his comments and flirting, but you put up the boundaries with yourself. BTW - your hair looked fantastic last night! Seriously, this sounds like the hallmark of the WAS. Draw you in and pull back. Over and over again.
Yep, I have a chronic case of whiplash from all the same song, different verse/pushing me away, pulling me back in. Boundaries must be established and change has to be made, because I can't take anymore of this rollercoaster.
He's joining us for dinner again tonight. We'll see how it goes. No pressure, no R talk, just some family time and my awful cooking.
Yep, I have a chronic case of whiplash from all the same song, different verse/pushing me away, pulling me back in. Boundaries must be established and change has to be made, because I can't take anymore of this rollercoaster.
He's joining us for dinner again tonight. We'll see how it goes. No pressure, no R talk, just some family time and my awful cooking.
That's right, Paige...maybe the WIllow Smith song, "Whip My Hair" should be my new theme song! Ha, ha!!! Believe me, it's been a LONG time since H has complimented and flirted or even spoken to me much at all. He has emotionally neglected me off and on for a very long time, and some of the things he has done in the last few months are just plain evil. So this is a nice change, but I know he can turn on a dime at any moment. Well, dinner was good, I suppose....H ended up staying the night. So much for my boundaries, huh? Get out the 2x4s. (PS...the kids don't know he stayed the night).
That couldn't be further from the truth for me. I think I just had it deep inside me and I'm drawing it out now. It's gotta be a God thing, an awakening deep inside.
Seriously, this sounds like the hallmark of the WAS. Draw you in and pull back. Over and over again.